If You Need a Doctor, I'll Examine Every Inch of You [Phys Evals; Open]

[meat_mooks]

Ever since the medical briefing on the comms, the medical bay staff has been preparing for an influx of appointments for physical evaluations, as well as a few walk-ins. After that, the hunt will be on for those who've been skipping such appointments.

A few of the staff members are going about their regular duties, expecting patients or simply biding time at the coffee machine until they're called on.

[OOC: please state the name of which med character(s) you want to administer the evaluation in the header to your comment. If you're fine with anyone tagging in, please indicate so. Available characters are Sakura, Howard, Dr. Faiza Hussain, Soren and Dr. Carson Beckett.]

Comments

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Sit on that table. I'm going to need you to talk to me about this so I know what to expect when I'm examining you." He quirks his head over to the side. "Do you have health issues?"

Aside from the obvious.

[teethofneedles]

"Aside from being undead? Naw. Occasionally bits of me fall off, but it's never anything important."

Aren't you glad you know this?

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"So can you actually, like, die?" Howard pulls a med sheet and looks it over. "I mean, is there anything you'd need to watch out for?"

[teethofneedles]

"Yeah. I can die," Karis snorted, "Just gotta do enough damage to me. Fire is bad. Holy energy is bad. Getting whacked with a sword is bad."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"So what is it, like, based on your spinal cord or something?" Howard looks over his tools and makes a mental calculation. Stethoscope, useless. Blood draw, yeah right. Urine sample - can zombies even pee? What would he be looking for? "And what can we do if you do have something nasty happen to you? I mean, I doubt you want a blood transfusion."

[teethofneedles]

"Human flesh," Her reply is casual, "...fresh. It helps keep me whole. And it tastes..."

She trails off with a shrug, "That'll work. Healing magic works, but it hurts. Usually, anyway, if it's holy. Not much else."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Howard gives an exaggerated, comedic shudder to cover up for the fact that he's actually shuddering.

"And how do we know if you're really dead and not just...dead unconscious?"

He's going to need to find some new euphemisms for dead.

[teethofneedles]

"I don't fall unconscious," Karis shrugged again, "Don't sleep. So you'll know. Trust me."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Man, if it ever comes to it, I'm totally putting you on watch duty." He writes that down. "So how old are you, and what's the difference between magic and holy magic?"

[teethofneedles]

"I usually just wander around anyway," Karis grunts. After a moment she leans back on her elbows. If possible, she sounds even more surly than usual.

"I'm twenty-nine. Or should be. Hell if I know how time works around here. Anyway... Holy magic is powered by the divine or by the light or whatever you wanna call it. It's powerful stuff. And it hurts undead like me. Normal magic still hurts, of course. But it's not... it's not like your fucking soul is on fire."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Sounds fun," he says dryly, writing all this down. "And any superpowers? Besides being able to put pieces of yourself back on."

In a way it's hard not to feel bad for Karis. Something awful happened to her once and she can never hide it. And it'll always bother her more than it does anyone else, but it will bother other people.

That makes two of them, he guesses.

"Then you just gotta go through the scanner to make sure you're not pregnant with an alien baby or anything."

[teethofneedles]

Karis stiffens just a bit. Well, not that she'd ever planned on getting pregnant, what with the no interest in men thing, but still. That rankled. Just a bit.

"Yeah. Well, the odds are pretty much against me ever bein' pregnant..."

She rubs at her face, "I don't needa breathe, I can see really well in the dark... Anything else?"

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"The odds are about as high for you as they are for me, I'd guess." Which, given Stacy, means not quite zero. For all they know they could end up brainswapped and in fertile bodies sometime just because of a glitch or magical princess or whatever.

He shakes his head. "Not really. All this stays confidential unless you give me permission to release it, and we have to put you through the scanner."

[teethofneedles]

"Fine. Let's get this stupid scan over. Stupid ship..."

Karis trails off into muttering as she levers herself up, eyes darting around the medbay as she starts her surly shuffle toward the machine.

"How's this work?"

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"It makes sure you don't have a bodysnatcher in you, pretty much. The one after that scans for any bacteria or viruses that could endanger the crew. And the third one just gives me a general printout of your anatomy."