trans_9 | We've got Movie Sign! [Open]

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We've got Movie Sign! [Open]

Deep from the dank, dark bowels of the Media Library... IT CAME! FROM THE CELLULOID!

Five terrible movies guaranteed to give you CHILLS! THRILLS! Or maybe just, I dunno, a vague sense that the universe has wronged you somehow and you want several hours of your life back.

Today, anyone walking into this particular Sensorium would be greeted by the sight of a late 20th century darkened movie theatre, playing a quintuple-feature consisting of old Earth movies that were honestly not very good. At the bottom of the seating area was some dude giving out free popcorn, candy, and drinks.

Howard, Zouichi, Allenby, and Jr. were around, and anyone else was welcome to walk in and join in.

[each of the movies is listed below, just tag in wherever you want. I put a small link in each movie's post so you can have some idea of what the movie is about, although honestly I would say that the movies themselves often do not actually know what they are about. All threads are open unless labeled 'closed'.

P.S. I'M SO SORRY I SHOULD HAVE PUT THIS UP EARLIER]

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Oh, the Master was in the front row for this one, munching on popcorn, laughing at all the wrong moments, and thoroughly enjoying himself. Very few things enraptured him, but children's programming was one of them.

Even dreadful children's programming.

"You know, it was even better in the original Italian," he told whoever happened to be sitting near him.

Was there a right place to laugh at this movie?

Zouichi glanced over at the Master, who he'd already decided was a little on the eccentric side. "I'm afraid I never got the chance to see it in Italian."

And probably never would, because what was this movie.

Howard scoots as far away he can from the Master without being obvious about it. Unfortunately, if he leaves his seat he'll be conspicuous, so really he's just leaning away a few inches.

"Wait, so we can blame Italy for this? I thought for sure it had to be some low-rent movie studio out of Canada."

Oh, and here came the questions. Unlike the Doctor, the Master really had no desire to school humans on their own history.

"Isn't it obvious?" he shrugged. "At least to anyone with a little culture."

"I feel as though responsibility for this can't be restricted to a single country," said Zouichi, still staring at the screen. Then he glanced back at the Master.

"You're looking much improved."

"Culture's overrated. Rapping dogs, that is culture." Seriously, what is this movie? It's so distasteful it's even making Howard uncomfortable.

He jerks a thumb over at the Master and whispers to Zouichi, "you know this guy?"

"Am I?" The Master shot Zouichi a look, not particularly wanting to be reminded of being at anyone's mercy. "I suppose time heals all wounds."

"And I didn't say it was good culture," he pointed out to Howard. Italians were only human, after all. At least he was fairly sure. Most of them.

Zouichi glanced back at Howard. "Sort of. We ran into each other after that Lirath mission, when everyone was milling around."

Sheesh. He was only expressing some concern over the Master's well-being. What was that look for? "Quite a bit." There. Nothing objectionable in that. Right?

"Anyway, I think I liked the one about the psychic tire better."

"This guy went on that paleontology dig with me," he says with a nod to the Master. Not mentioning that the Master swindled him or possibly tried to murder Daniel Jackson at all, thank you very much. "Improved over what?"

He wraps his arms around his jumbo popcorn. "I think I liked my last dental surgery better."

The Master takes a moment to imagine performing dental surgery on the two of them, smiling to himself. Sans anesthetic, of course.

"Oh, nothing," he says dismissively to Howard, with another look at Zouichi. "Just a few war wounds. Line of duty and all that."

Time to change the subject. "The tire 'film'?" he huffs scornfully. "That wasn't even a musical."

Zouichi took the look as a sign that the Master didn't want to discuss his injury right now, although he didn't really understand why... he'd gotten it while trying to repair the ship, hadn't he? No shame in that.

That sure was a creepy smile, though.

"You're a fan of musicals?" Somehow, the Master just didn't seem the type.

Howard honestly doesn't want to imagine what Rubber would have been like as a musical. It might create a black hole of awful on par with this terrible movie.

He does, however, scoot in his seat a little further away from the Master, and sinks down in the chair so he's hard to see behind Zouichi. They can keep talking; he'll just make himself small and easy to ignore. If the goal was to creep Howard out, the Master accomplished it despite saying only completely innocuous things.

Zouichi would probably find out sooner or later that the Master was just full of surprises. His love of musicals being the least of them.

"Who isn't?" he waved a hand dismissively, eyes glued to the screen, as if whoever wasn't a fan of musicals had no sense at all.

"You like musicals, don't you, Howie?" As if the Master was going to let Howard bow out that easily.

"I've never seen one, so I suppose I can't be counted as a fan," said Zouichi, glancing at Howard. Was he afraid of the Master for some reason? Well, Howard did tend to be a little on the fearful side, but...

"Only American Idiot, and I never actually saw it. I just made my mom play the CD set on the way to school for like a year," he says, trying to sound like he's just being casual and mildly irritated. "And please don't call me that."

He gives Zouichi an 'I'll explain later' look, but he's not quite sure what excuse he'll dredge up. 'I think I might have walked in on this guy trying to murder someone and didn't tell anyone because I don't want him to target me too'?

Yeah, that'll fly really well with Zou. Howard will probably go with 'he threatened to feed me to bugs'.

Edited 2011-11-11 01:15 (UTC)

'American Idiot.' Oh yes, the Master supposes that fits. Two words probably never went so well together-- well. Supposing you took 'Doctor' out of your vocabulary.

"You're missing out," he says simply, popping another kernel into his mouth.

"What's American Idiot?" asked Zouichi, following it up with a look directed at Howard. "And can I get an actual explanation this time, please, instead of randomly selected details that leave me with more questions than answers?"

"Oh, come on, Zou. You're going to get on my case about mentioning things out of context when we're watching a rapping dog on the Titanic?"

Howard shakes his head, deciding he doesn't care if the Master thinks he's missing out. The Master probably has weird taste. The Master probably likes Eraserhead too.

"It's a musical by a band I used to like, about...teenagers or something." Now that Howard thinks about it, maybe he doesn't want a bunch of songs about the inherent dysfunction of youth on his iPod.

"Ah, you're absolutely right. That sounds much more interesting," the Master says-- with perhaps a touch of dryness. His innocent expression is still glued to the screen.

"That's specific," said Zouichi. "So one of the teenagers is the American Idiot?"

"All teenagers are American Idiots. Except the ones from other countries. They're some-other-place idiots." He's sure 'John Smith' would probably agree. The guy doesn't seem one to suffer people all that much. "And they all get addicted to drugs and their girlfriends dump them or something. It's not really a great story or anything."

Howard squints at the screen and opens his mouth a few times to go on before finding the words of "wait, I thought the Titanic sank, not 'was saved by a giant pink octopus'."

The Master does grin at that. He'd expand it to include most humans, though, adolescent and otherwise.

"Shush, Howie," he murmurs. "It's clearly sinking. Besides, nobody said it was historically accurate." Though truth be told, he detests this part. Let the damned thing sink, and the human filth with it.

"In more ways than one," Zouichi said, watching the pink octopus with no small amount of skepticism.

"Sounds like a depressing story."

"I don't know if the original depresses me or if I just think it's super ironic. 'The Unsinkable Ship'? Why not just call it the SS Iceberg Magnet?" Howard shoots another little glare at the Master before sinking back in his seat again.

Actually, the Master can quite appreciate that point-- as well as Howard's growing ire. He sends another grin 'Howie's' way.

Privately though, he thinks the entire affair was less depressingly ironic and more on the order of absolutely hilarious.

"Humans do so love to tempt fate, don't they? Put a bear in a cage, conveniently forget to set the latch, and then poke it with a stick." He shrugs. "No wonder the Italians felt the need to spice things up a bit."

We've got Movie Sign! [Open]

Re: Titanic: The Animated Musical

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Oh, Howard

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OMG there are two of these atrocities aren't there.

I think so

Re: I think so

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