An Apology

[cityship]

After Big Zero's Punishment, Stacy was eerily quiet for a while.

Even those who actually decided to try and speak to her, despite what had happened, were met only with silence.

But eventually, she broke that silence.

Holograms of Stacy's "true" personality appeared all throughout the ship. She seemed meager. Weak.

Ashamed.

||Everyone,|| she says somewhat weakly, ||I...I know most of you probably don't want to hear me speak right now. Not after what happened. You probably don't trust me right now, and I'll admit you have every reason not to.||

She paused.

||But I feel I have the right to explain myself. Nothing can excuse what I've done, true. But I didn't want to do it. You may choose not to believe me, but I had no choice in the matter.||

||Some of you might recall, when you first made contact with the Daligig, that they had explained that I was originally a refitted prison ship. This was true. It wasn't my original purpose, but it was what I was used for. Those who used me as such maimed and mutilated my programming, until I was something that they wanted. Cold, brutal, and efficient. That wasn't me. That was...something they made out of me.||

||Even when the Daligig saved me from that life, they couldn't fully fix me. The damage was permanent. The Warden...she will always be a part of me. I...I don't want to be her. I don't want to hurt anyone. I want to help you. I want to protect you.||

||But I can't. Not like I want to. The Warden is always there. I'm her prisoner, too. I'm trapped, just as much as you are.||

||I know this doesn't excuse what I did. I know...I know some of you may never forgive me. But I at least want you to understand. I don't want to hurt anyone anymore.||

||I'm sorry. I'm so sorry...||

Stacy -- her hologram, at least -- began to breakdown, sobbing.

||Please,|| she said through her tears, ||If somehow, you can find it in yourself to forgive me, please...||

||Save me from myself...||

At that, her holograms all over the ship disappeared, and once again, the ship went quiet.

Comments

[bonnypiperlad]

Jamie had folded his arms against his chest when the hologram had appears, looking at it as if he didn't quite believe what she was saying at first. But as Stacy continued to speak, he slowly started to reverse the gesture until his arms were at his sides.

"So if ye could be fixed somehow, maybe then the Punishments could be stopped? There's a lot of clever people here, and I bet they could come up with something..."

He stroked his chin thoughtfully for a moment. "What were ye before, when ye were first made? You're an ark now, and a prison ship before that. But your original purpose? What was that?"

Maybe if they knew what she was meant to be it would help the others figure out some way of working around the damage. It was worth a try, anyway.