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trans_92010-02-20 06:00 pm
mapquest-titan.livejournal.com) wrote in trans_92010-02-20 06:00 pm
Entry tags:
I've Become So Numb [Open]
First it was the nightmares. The memories pushing back fifteen years to the last day he'd seen his father alive, the day the Drej had come out of nowhere and obliterated Earth and turned the thousands that had managed to escape into refugees. Without a home, they had become shunned by the other races, viewed with disdain. Ignored at best, openly attacked at worst.
His time on the ship had somehow allowed him to forget all that. Maybe it was being around so many other humans--the first time in fifteen years that Cale had been part of a 'majority.' Or perhaps it was that, now, everyone was in the same boat as he was, the boat he'd been in since he was four years old. Their homes were gone. Destroyed by a mysterious alien race. Whatever the reason, Cale had allowed himself to begin to forget the home he never had, to forget Earth, to forget the Titan, and to forget his father.
That was, until, the dreams.
They'd first come when he was asleep, jarring him awake with their vividness. There were several times that Cale been convinced they were real, only to wake up and be surprised that he wasn't a four year-old kid anymore. He was a nineteen year-old young man.
He wandered the streets of the city, meandering his way aimlessly until by pure chance he happened upon the statuary. He didn't recognize any of the stone sculptures. Most of them were supposed to be from Earth. That's what he'd been told by others in the crew. Who knew if it was true. Cale didn't. He'd been just a kid when the planet was blown to pieces. He didn't know squat about humanity or its history. Just that it was dying and would likely be extinct in another few hundred years. And there was nothing anyone could do to stop it. Especially not him, no matter how much Akima and Korso tried to tell him differently. Earth was gone. There was no getting it back.
If only the nightmares had just stayed nightmares. Sleep was easy enough to avoid. Short cat-naps here and there allowed him to get a little rest, keep from hallucinating, without slipping into the dreamworld where his past seemed poised, waiting for him. But they hadn't just stayed nightmares. Now, the nightmares seemed to be alive. His past had walked alongside him. No. Not walked alongside him. It had tried to kill him. His past, the responsibility that had been dumped on him, was back and wasn't going to let him go. Even his father was a part of it. The man who had abandoned him, left it to him to finish what Sam had started. It was his fault the survival of their species had been dumped on Cale's shoulders.
And the Drej. If it weren't for those bastards, Earth would still exist. His dad wouldn't have left him. And everyone wouldn't be looking to Cale to save them.
"Aaaaaaargh!!!" Cale shouted snatching up what appeared to be a stone arm, broken from one of the statues--likely during one of the many battles the crew had fought in the city--and started swinging. He decapitated Venus di Milo. Another blow sent David's leg hurtling across the room. "Leave me alone!" he raged, striking the statues at random. "You're all DEAD!!! It's too late. It's all over. What the hell do you want me to do?!? Huh? What the hell do you want from me?!?"
His time on the ship had somehow allowed him to forget all that. Maybe it was being around so many other humans--the first time in fifteen years that Cale had been part of a 'majority.' Or perhaps it was that, now, everyone was in the same boat as he was, the boat he'd been in since he was four years old. Their homes were gone. Destroyed by a mysterious alien race. Whatever the reason, Cale had allowed himself to begin to forget the home he never had, to forget Earth, to forget the Titan, and to forget his father.
That was, until, the dreams.
They'd first come when he was asleep, jarring him awake with their vividness. There were several times that Cale been convinced they were real, only to wake up and be surprised that he wasn't a four year-old kid anymore. He was a nineteen year-old young man.
He wandered the streets of the city, meandering his way aimlessly until by pure chance he happened upon the statuary. He didn't recognize any of the stone sculptures. Most of them were supposed to be from Earth. That's what he'd been told by others in the crew. Who knew if it was true. Cale didn't. He'd been just a kid when the planet was blown to pieces. He didn't know squat about humanity or its history. Just that it was dying and would likely be extinct in another few hundred years. And there was nothing anyone could do to stop it. Especially not him, no matter how much Akima and Korso tried to tell him differently. Earth was gone. There was no getting it back.
If only the nightmares had just stayed nightmares. Sleep was easy enough to avoid. Short cat-naps here and there allowed him to get a little rest, keep from hallucinating, without slipping into the dreamworld where his past seemed poised, waiting for him. But they hadn't just stayed nightmares. Now, the nightmares seemed to be alive. His past had walked alongside him. No. Not walked alongside him. It had tried to kill him. His past, the responsibility that had been dumped on him, was back and wasn't going to let him go. Even his father was a part of it. The man who had abandoned him, left it to him to finish what Sam had started. It was his fault the survival of their species had been dumped on Cale's shoulders.
And the Drej. If it weren't for those bastards, Earth would still exist. His dad wouldn't have left him. And everyone wouldn't be looking to Cale to save them.
"Aaaaaaargh!!!" Cale shouted snatching up what appeared to be a stone arm, broken from one of the statues--likely during one of the many battles the crew had fought in the city--and started swinging. He decapitated Venus di Milo. Another blow sent David's leg hurtling across the room. "Leave me alone!" he raged, striking the statues at random. "You're all DEAD!!! It's too late. It's all over. What the hell do you want me to do?!? Huh? What the hell do you want from me?!?"
no subject
Well. They tried. Perhaps they made it, for a while. But then, at this stage, no race can be said to have prevailed in the fight for survival. Not with the Ohm on the loose.
"I am sorry for your loss."
It is one he understands.
no subject
no subject
"Of course." Clear in his tone is his disbelief. But this is not a fight worth starting.