Spared [Open]

[theboywhodied]

"Reducto!"

Cedric had found a spot in the grass of this strange city's park from which to work on his spellcasting, starting with some target practice. He'd pushed back the sleeves of his plantsuit as far as was possible and made long movements with his wand, alternating between creating fast streams of bubbles and shooting them down. The almost childish game of bubble-popping was a simple diversion from the stream of thoughts that was flowng just as fast, one that hadn't stopped since the moment he realized he was alive: I'm about to die. It was hard to comprehend, when it seemed like his life had been going so well just hours ago.

Yet these Ohm had thrown everything off balance. Cedric had gone straight to Stacy to ask for his memories restored, as he'd never rest until he knew the truth of what happened. It had been just as hard to remember as that unicorn princess had predicted. Sure, the curse that was meant to kill him had been thrown off by another attack, but he'd heard awful yells. Harry's. When the sedation had worn off and he'd opened his eyes, he'd had to struggle not to scream.

That was what had happened to disrupt the course of history. For now, he had been given days, weeks, maybe months or a year or two to live, that long until he left this crew behind and met his fate. People had talked about their worlds being restored after the war. The Ohm were supposed had something that would fix things as they were meant to be, and 'meant to be' was his death. If he didn't die during the war, he'd be meeting his end immediately afterward. Time couldn't be changed, not even with a Time Turner. It had to happen.

Cedric was living on borrowed time. No one knew how long it would be until they won. They were going to win, he was sure. A small selfish part of him hoped that it would last a while, that he would have time to finish his unfinished business and learn more, but that was unfair. He couldn't allow the needless deaths to hang over his conscience any longer than necessary. The countless innocents killed during the Ohm's attack needed to live, not him. Billions of lives resurrected in exchange for his death, that was fair. He was the spare, not them. No matter what his father said or the Goblet decided, he wasn't special in the eyes of the universe, was he? He was just...

The spare who had been temporarily spared. A bubble waiting to be popped. Pop, pop, pop went the bubbles as his wand moved more precisely. If this was all the life he had left, he might as well do it right.

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[theboywhodied]

Cedric looked up, and his expression wavered, but he couldn't quite bring himself to believe that it could be possible. That he could survive, have a seventh year, deal with that horrible Professor Umbridge, reunite with his family, graduate, go on with the career he'd wanted. Certain death was so much...surer, less messy.

"My life isn't over yet, I suppose," he said slowly, thinking hard on something. "All of this is an opportunity. I already promised Harry we could get to know each other better, and I won't back out on that."

He just wasn't so sure about the others.

[myboggartismoon.livejournal.com]

"No, it is not. You're in danger here and I won't pretend otherwise, we have suffered one loss that I know of on a mission. But... you are too young to have lived through the war," he said, solemnly. His eyes had drifted to a place far away, not seeing anything but memory. "When Voldemort and his Death Eaters were on the loose, death was more likely on any given day than it is now, here. Many people lived in fear and resignation, believing they could do nothing.

"But I don't think that's your nature," he said, abruptly focusing on Cedric again. "You are going to die, tomorrow or at the end of this ship or decades from now, it will happen eventually. That was true before you came on this ship, or before you even started Hogwarts. But you are alive right now, that is also undeniable."

[theboywhodied]

Cedric bowed his head, listening with a heavy heart. He only knew of those times from his parents' stories, the explanations for why certain people didn't have their parents. And according to Harry, the war had resumed right after he'd died. Yes, this was his first time fighting in these conditions.

He was here, and therefore he had a purpose. That was enough for Stacy, and it would be enough for him. Cedric lowered his fingers to his wand, determination overtaking his thoughts. "I'm fighting. Some...well, some say I shouldn't, to give myself longer to live. But we have no idea whether that would work, for a start, and it's not right. People are depending on us."

He'd gotten back into the 'fighter' mode, completely glossing over the issue of his reluctance to make new friends, but that would be forcibly addressed in time. Several people would demand it.

[myboggartismoon.livejournal.com]

"Exactly," Lupin said with a smile. "Of course you shouldn't be in a rush to sacrifice yourself. Fight wisely and well. But there are worse things than death, and I think not fighting when you ought to is one of them."

[theboywhodied]

Cedric nodded seriously, though he suspected there was a story behind his professor's words. That war had changed them all, just as the other war had changed Harry, and this one would affect him.

"I agree. And I think I've figured out the omnicom devices. You'll be able to contact me for the project, or for anything else."

He still intended to have some tea someday. Maybe after he splinched himself and needed a bit of a rest.

[myboggartismoon.livejournal.com]

"I hope that Harry and Sirius take to it as quickly," he said, though he couldn't help but smile at the thought of Sirius's efforts at doing so.