trans_9 | It's Hard to Get People to Like You When You're a Vampire

Current Mood: contemplative

Entry tags:

It's Hard to Get People to Like You When You're a Vampire

Nanashi had found an open Sensorium, and had quickly summoned up the war room from her castle. The walls were lined with books. Nanashi had read so many of these so many times you could open them and be able to read what they said.

But Nanashi was not concerned with the books, she was standing over a table with tiny sculptures of warriors with blades like hers- along with some of the people she knew on the ship or remember from the battle. Opposite them were sculptures of the various Ohm, clashed in mid battle. Nanashi was trying to recreate the battle on the board.

She had meant to be going over how she should gain some trust among the humans for her campaign without taking advantage of her relationship with several of the children on the ship, but the final parts of the battle just were not sitting right with her.

Something was off... Aside from the fact that the Ohm clearly decided to leave.

Even as she concentrated on the table, she had decided to leave the door open, with a "Vote for Nanashi, Vote for Experience" sign on the door. She thought it sounded catchy. She did not like 'catchy', but others seemed to. Below was a scroll that read, "Have any questions? My door is always open!"

Well, figuratively it was at least. And only for the purposes of her campaign. Normally she liked closed doors. Locked doors. They helped keep out the assassins.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

She looked over at Sam, forcing a smile that was shockingly honest looking, if not for the pink liquid gloss over her eyes, "I am okay."

You are not okay. You hear my voice, you hear your mother's voice. That is insane. Do you really believe in the legends about blood and souls? You really believe that we may just be whispers of the people you most hated, hanging on to your soul to torment you? Ha!

"This man is a doctor. Why don't you ask him to help you? See if he does not say you are possessed by the devil, that you are insane. See if he can fix you."

Standing quickly, Nanashi shouted, "Why won't you just shut up?" She put her hands over her ears, pressing them closed with her palms while grabbing her hair with her fingers. In her anger Nanashi had stopped breathing, but she was still shaking, clearly not 'okay'.

Sam stood with her at her outburst. He put himself in front of her, and took her hands in his. "It's alright, Nanashi. Listen to my voice. Focus just on mine, not on his. He's dead. He doesn't matter anymore. All that matters is what's happening now, and the war ahead of us. Do you understand?" His voice was calm, but insistent. He tried to pull her hands down from her ears.

She focused on his eyes and allowed him to pull her hands away after a moment of resistance.

The war. Killing the Ohm so that the children of her world could return to a happy life. Was this not why she was not just doing as she pleased, even if it got her locked away? Wasn't getting revenge the reason why she did not just find one of the wall-beds and take the 'little death' that she had denied herself so long?

Kano's voice cut through her line of thought, through her focus,"Isn't he another part of why you do not take your little death? Can't you see, how easily you let your guard down for him. If this was any one else doing this for you, wouldn't you be doubting them, asking them why?"

"No... I mean, not to you Sam. But I cannot afford to take a little death." Nanashi shook her head, as if she could shake Kano out of her ear, "I must focus on this war and winning it."

He smiled a bit, seeing that he'd gotten through. He interlaced his fingers into hers. "Yes, that's right. If there's anyone I'd like to follow into this war, it's you."

He'd gotten through, but Nanashi was having doubts, and let her hands lay limp in his. What if Kano was right, what if he was trying to use her too? She pulled her hands away, "Do you really mean that? Or are you just trying to win me over with flattery?"

She looked him straight in the eye. She would see if he was lying to her. She did not want to ask her next question without having some sort of idea if he was taking advantage of her or not. "Do not lie to me. I have been lied to enough that I know how to see it."

"You waste your time. I lied to your face every day when I told you I loved you and you did not see once."

Nanashi gritted her teeth, her eyes darting off to the side she heard Kano's voice from. "Silence. I want to hear what Sam has to say." She returned her focus to his eyes, waiting for his answer.

"I do," he responded, smiling wider. He gently caressed her cheek.

Her heart skipped a beat, seeing no sign of a lie in his face. Could he really mean that?

"You know that's impossible."

She was distracted from Kano's words by Sam's touch. She held his hand against her cheek, closing her eyes softly.

"Is that really true?"

She wanted to believe him. She really did.

"Yes, Nanashi. I won't ever lie to you. I'm not that kind of person. I never have, and I would rather take a sun bath than ever become that kind of person." There was a definite intense note in his voice.

By being everything his father wasn't, he would flout everything that man had said he would be, and become the kind of father his father didn't have the courage to be.

Her stomach flipped at the words, and her own reaction. She could feel her guard slipping, though it was not completely gone. She just couldn't really believe that 'that kind of person' could exist.

Kano felt the need not only to point out her falling guard, but to tell her that she fell for words to easily.

She stepped back and let herself land on the bed. "You as well as I know that is not true," she said to Kano, but realized how it sounded without Kano's words. She gently touched Sam's hand, looking up at him, "I believe you, however." Well, she was the closest she could get to believing him. That would have to do.

She closed her eyes and lowered her hand and her head, letting it sort of fall limp. "I am insane..." she muttered. Kano was getting to her worse than usual.

Sam smiled. "I am going to make it my mission to convince you that you're not insane. Or, any more insane than vampires tend to be, at least." He laughed a bit, and lifted her hand to his lips to kiss it, out of respect.

When he had leaned to do so, he had gotten very close to her. When he realized what he was very near to doing, he turned bright red, up to his ears, and took a step back with a nervous laugh. "Ah..."

She smiled weakly back at him. Her heart skipped a beat as he nearly kissed her hand. This was not the courtly Queen-subject sort of hand kiss, but the way you would to a lover.

She noticed he pulled back, bright red, and she couldn't help to be disappointed. But of course. He had a wife. At the same time, it gave her hope that she could steal him from her.

She smiled reassuringly at Sam, though there was melancholy to her smile. "I thank you, though I have not heard of any other vampire that hears the voices of others. And they are not just in my mind. I hear them. It took a very long time to train myself to not reply to them, knowing that no one else can hear them, however it is rather hard- as I am sure you can tell."

He nodded with understanding. "Well, I wouldn't say it's the same thing, but I have something similar. I'm sure you recall what I told Ed about the link that's created between myself and someone that I share my blood with. My brother and I have had that connection ever since he'd turned me. It took me a while to get through to him that telling me random jokes and trying to make me laugh while I'm conducting surgery or in meetings is not as funny as he thinks it is." He was trying to lighten the mood, and offered a smile accordingly, though it came off a bit more wistful and nostalgic than he'd intended.

She smiled, but leaned forward, "I suppose. At least he is real. At least you could see him." She looked like she was looking to a far off time. "At least you can reason with him. There is not reasoning with either of them."

"Do you know," Nanashi said with a cold laugh, "what the only thing my mother ever said directly to me was? Before I killed her that is." She put her elbows on her knees so that her hands crossed and hung her head so that they rested on them.

He was a bit uncertain, but he shook his head. "No, you haven't said," his face was solemn. He mentally prepared himself for this, and pushed away his lingering guilt of his own mother's death.

Nanashi struggled to speak, opening and closing her mouth several times before finally saying, "As I pinned her down, just before I put a stake in her heart, she looked at me, confused. I thought she was going to ask me why I was doing such a thing, but I will never forget what she said; 'Who are you?'"

Nanashi's hands had curled into fists, her long nails cutting into her palms, making blood roll down her fingers slowly. She did not even seem to notice as she closed her eyes against the words, doing her best to block out both Chiharu and Kano as they attempted to taunt her.

He flinched for her sake. "...I'm sorry." It fell woefully short of the pain she was no doubt in, but he had nothing else to say.

Nanashi was feeling a strange tension in her chest as she sat there silently for a minute, the blood dripping slowly to the floor now. She was shaking a bit as she muttered, tears threatening the edges of her words, "She... She did not even recognise me as her child."

He pulled her into a hug. That too, seemed to fall woefully short of what was necessary for her to heal, but she deserved it nonetheless. "I'm sorry, Nanashi," he repeated gently.

Nanashi stiffened in surprise, expecting to feel a stake through her back. he could easily have done so, shattering her shoulder bone so that it pierced her heart, and then she would be helpless. But no pain came, no paralisis. She relaxed a bit.

"Why are you sorry?" she asked bitterly, "You have done nothing to me yet."

He paused for a moment. Yes, the wounds cut very deep for her. "I'm sorry you've had to feel that pain. It's unbearable."

She shuddered and pulled back. She was really getting to close to him. No one on the ship was supposed to get to know her. She would just end up leaving them all when they figured out from the Ohm how to get their worlds back.

With all the lies she'd made about her home, there was no way she could let anyone visit. And that's why she couldn't let anyone get too close even if... She tried to crush down the thought 'even if I love them.'

She ignored the tightness in her chest, the rush of her heartbeat. She stood up and walked to the other side of the room. "I do not need pity," I want your sympathy, "I have borne it well enough up until now."

He shook his head, and followed her. "It's not pity. I understand exactly how you feel. I spent my entire human life trying to get my father to acknowledge my value as a person and trying to make him proud of me." He sighed. "God, that sounds pathetic..." he muttered to himself, scrubbing his face with his hand.

"If that is pathetic, than I am no better." Nanashi's voice had taken on a sort of cold glaze. Normally it was soft, sensuous, sexual- but it sounded more like snow. Still soft, but cold, lonely.

"Hundreds of years, and not a glance did she grant me." She was still talking, but it was clear she was starting to try to throw her walls back up. She had let them too far down too many times. She couldn't allow any distractions. He would just ruin her plans and abandon her, like any other she had aloowed in her life.

"--I didn't mean you," he replied quickly. "Every time I'd trip over my own feet or Dad found out about a sports tryout that I hadn't gone to, or just came home drunk from the bar after watching some game, he'd start in on me." He noted the changes, and was worried about fixing what he'd said. The last thing he wanted was to lose a friend like this.

"I know what you meant." She said keeping the pain from her voice. She knew it was hurting him. She didn't want to hurt him, of all people. Normally she didn't care one way or another.

But this was the problem. She did care. It meant she was getting soft. "I just meant to say that if the lengths you went to to gain their affections was pathetic, than I am too, since I tried just as hard. But this is all in the past now. It does not matter." She waved her hand dismissively. She kept talking because she couldn't stand to just throw him out. She wanted to keep him in her life. She found that she cared too much to not.

Just use him. Use him to learn more about yourself, to protect yourself better. Find some way to use him to advance your goals. Turn the conversation away from yourself. "I wanted to talk more about investigating my inner workings. Are you still interested?"

It's Hard to Get People to Like You When You're a Vampire

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)