trans_9 | Keeping Occupied

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Keeping Occupied

Cale stood in the media library in one of the pod-rooms, the broken pod-room, to be exact. His brow was creased and his nose scrunched up as he concentrated on the bizarre-looking terminal on the wall. He pressed one of the buttons and got a low ‘beep’ in reply, but the screen remained blank. He tried another. Another beep, still blank. He frowned but he wasn’t giving up. With practically nothing to do on this ship—what with the medbay taken over by the crabby green guy and this being the only other area left on the ship (the sensoriums were almost in constant use by other crew members) with any kind of identifiable technological aspect to it, Cale was determined to at least keep himself busy. And busy meant trying to TURN THAT DAMN SONG OFF!

Over and over the thing had repeated. Never stopping. Never giving even a moment’s break, and with the door wide open and it playing full volume, it was impossible to concentrate anywhere else in the media library—which is what he’d been trying to do earlier. Now, he was determined to fix what was broken…or at least drive himself crazy trying.

Beep. Beep-beep. Beep. Beep-beep-beep. Beep-beep. Beep. Beep.

There! Right there! He’d had it. It went away but he’d still had it, if only for an instant. The screen flashed for just a moment and then went black again. He was making progress, getting closer. It was just a matter of time before that painstakingly awful song was gone for good.

“Yeah, and you thought I couldn’t do it, didn’t you,” Cale said aloud, apparently speaking to the troublesome terminal. “Well, I’ve got news for you buddy, I am about to own you.”

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Someone came in and hopped over the back of the couch near him, landing with a bounce without so much as a how d'you do.

"What's on the Teevee?"

"On the what?" Cale asked, glancing over his shoulder to cast a bewildered look at his newest visitor.

"Television. Boob tube. Idiot box."

Cale quirked a brow at Leela. "And that is what exactly?"

"It's a box." She holds out her hand. "With moving pictures. You don't got any viewscreens or whatever the hell? It's like that, but they made programming for it and people watched it, and they sold ad space to make money from it. They showed the ads at breaks in between stuff."

"And you...you watched this...television? Willingly?" Cale asked. "People in the past stare at viewscreens?"

"Commercials were boring as anything, but sometimes, yeah. There were some good shows sometimes. I liked the educational stuff. They'd have programs on science and history. Some good cartoons. Depended on how good the story was or what they were showing off," she says, snagging one of the media pads and starting to scroll through.

"Read a lot more books though."

Cale turned his attention back to the broken panel, shaking his head. "You're doing it again," he said.

"Doing what?"

"That whole 'let's bond and get to know each other' thing," Cale answered.

"Goddamn, you're right, what was I thinking?" she says with the same exact dry tone of before, still scrolling through her books.

"I mean, it's not like, despite the fact that you're a snot, I enjoy your wit or something."

Cale scoffed.

"That's not my wit you keep staring at."

She makes a scoffing noise. "Right now I'm staring at some Vonnegut, actually." She is. God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian, to be exact. "How long exactly is it gonna take to get it through you thick head that I just wanna get to know you, but not 'cause I'm all warm for your form? There is a middle ground, y'know, where people find something interesting about someone else, and just want to find out more. I've done it with a lot of people on this boat."

"Oh yeah? So tossing guys onto the ground and straddling them is an ordinary, everyday thing for you?" Cale countered. "Gosh, and here I thought I was special."

"Yeah, actually. Well, it's not just guys. I got into a hell of an awesome fight with that girl Rose. With the one eye? We kicked each other's asses and then shot the shit afterward. It was awesome."

"Sorry I missed it." Really, he was. Especially given the way he and Rose managed to not get along. "She was in here earlier bugging me and acting like she knew more about what I was doing than I do. Watching her get the crap beat out of her would've been nice."

"Actually, it was a draw. She's good. She could take your ass down in three seconds." It's said with a smile though. She's teasing again.

A chill ran up Cale's spine as the thought of Rose doing the same thing to him that Leela had done popped into his mind. "Ok...that's just disturbing. That isn't the mental picture I really needed right now."

"What mental pictures do you want? I've got a ton of other horrible ones I could impart," she says, pressing the button to flick to the next page.

"None, thanks," Cale answers. He then pushes another sequence of buttons--like he's been doing all day--and finally gets a result. Albeit, it's not the one that he's been looking for.

For the third time, the song changes...

...My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard,
And their like
It's better than yours,
Damn right it's better than yours,
I can teach you,
But I have to charge...

And thanks to Rose, it's LOUD!

Cale frantically pushed the buttons on the control panel, trying to shut the latest bit of 'culture' that the broken pod-room was now subjecting him to.

...I know you want it,
The thing that makes me,
What the guys go crazy for.
They lose their minds,
The way I wind,
I think its time...

The song finally went quiet for a few seconds before switching back to the familiar 'Three O'Clock Blues.'

Cale meanwhile, is just staring at the control panel, his face white and his eyes wide. "What...was...that?"

She laughs. Hard.

"I have. No. Clue. But it sounds like bad rap. Maybe it's a follow up to the Thong Song."

"The what song??" Cale looks at Leela with a bewildered look. He's utterly confused.

"The Thong Song. Y'all know what a thong is?" Hey, probably not many chicks running around in 'em in space.

"Uh...no."

Leela scans through her little datapad and does a search. It actually takes a few seconds to find something, but sure enough, she finds a pic of a couple of chicks in bikinis, one of which is wearing a thong, and holds it up.

"The bottom. With the string. Often used as beachwear or underwear. Sometimes by dudes, but deeefinitely not as good on them as it looks on girls. Not many tan lines, as you can see."

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