Pebble For Your Thoughts? [Open]

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Kelly was in the sensoriums again. This time, not to train or run battle simulations, but to let her frustrations out. The room had morphed into what would, under normal circumstances, have been a peaceful panorama. A large lake took up the center of a clearing in a forest. A stream fed it at one end, with others flowing out from all around the vaguely oval shaped body of water. Kelly remembered coming here as a child on Reach. They hadn't had much time to simply enjoy themselves back then, but she'd always wanted to go back. It had looked like such a serene spot. That was, before the Covenant had glassed the planet. This room was probably the only place the lake even existed anymore.

At the edge of the lake, was an old, tin sign that warned any potential swimmers of the dangerous undercurrents that had swept several unwary soldiers on rec time to their deaths. Kelly wasn't here to swim though. Standing on the pebbly shore, the water lapping at her bare feet, she had a handful of stones and was skipping them (with far more force than necessary) across the water. She'd always been a dead shot with a weapon, but then, that could have been said of any of her brothers and sisters. Brothers and sisters who were all dead now. Those who the Covenant hadn't gotten to, wiped out by those bastards the Ohm. All except John. But it wasn't as if the Chief was around, even when Stacy wasn't sending him on secret missions. She didn't mind it, he had to do what he had to do. She understood. Lately though, the dreams, no, the nightmares she'd been having. They made her want...someone around. John had been one of the pillars of her life for as long as she could remember.

Now though, she had found new comrades on the ship. People she cared about, people she would have laid down her life to protect. Sherry, Brenda, Katara, Sokka, Lafiel. Lafiel. The little Abh was one of the first she'd met on the ship, one of the ones she would admit that she cared about probably more than was advisable. But she hadn't been able to protect her, had she? The Empress had been hit in the face, and what had the big strong Spartan done? Nothing except sputter. She didn't even know who the culprit was. She hated feeling useless, redundant, helpless. And the whole situation with the Nightmare King made her feel so. How could she fight what she couldn't even touch. Someone who could hurt her in her dreams. How could she protect anyone? Spartans never failed, but hadn't she failed?

Hefting another rock, she threw it again, drowning out the thoughts with action. Gritting her teeth, she hefted another rock and this time, turned and threw it at the sign. The pebble hit the metal with a loud crash, breaking into a million tiny fragments. Dropping the pebbles that remained in her hand, she stepped back and sat down on the shore, curling her legs up in front of her and wrapping her arms around them as the weather shifted. It seemed to reflect her mood, the sky turned dark, and a cold wind swept across the water. She stared out moodily over the vaguely shimmering liquid.

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[theregularguy.livejournal.com]

Sokka had been hoping to get in some time swimming at Ember Island, and had been ready to take off in mild disappointment when he noticed the Sensoriums were in use. Until he noticed Kelly staring out over the water of the lake. He took a few steps in, hoping he wouldn't be disturbing the older woman. He strolled up to stand next to her, hands in his pockets (pockets were so awesome).

"Hey. Uh. Something on your mind?"

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

It was a testament to how tired the woman was that she hadn't noticed him approaching sooner. Walking over the pebbly shore wasn't exactly a feat easily accomplished in silence. Specially when the senses of the person you were approaching were heightened due to augmentations. Despite all this however, Kelly didn't notice the boy until he spoke. The sudden voice made her start, but she recovered in an instant, quickly hiding the momentary unawareness. Without turning to face him, she answered, still staring moodily out over the water as thunder rumbled overhead.

"Hey Sokka. Nothing in particular."

[theregularguy.livejournal.com]

"You look tired. I think you are tired. You didn't even know I was here until I said something. Usually you're pretty on the spot about that kind of thing..." Sokka frowned, reaching up to pull his sunglasses off and tuck them into a pocket for safekeeping. That concerning.

"Have you been getting any sleep? At all?"

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Turning her head, she fixed the boy with a look. It really wasn't his fault, but she could take care of herself. Though her current actions probably didn't back that statement up very well. "I'm fine. Just a little on edge." She turned her attention back to the water, her hair falling to hide her eyes. "I just wasn't paying attention, that's all." The thing about Kelly? She'd never had to lie before. So she was terrible at it.

His question was met with a shrug. "No one's been getting any sleep."

[theregularguy.livejournal.com]

"You're not a very good liar, Kelly..." He stepped up to lay a hand hand on her shoulder. She was his friend and he wasn't about to let her just brush him off. Not if there was something he could do to help.

"You should at least try. If you're tired enough that you didn't notice me, what's going to happen if we need you to do some of your butt kicking stuff later?"

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

"Hn. Never thought I'd regret that fact." She tensed when he laid his hand there. It wasn't something she was used to...physical contact. Sure, she did it to others all the time, but no one ever actually touched her. It wasn't something she'd ever had to grow accustomed to.

"I'll be fine. I'll get one of the doctors to inject me with adrenaline or something. I'm not going to sleep, Sokka." A pause. "You have no idea what these nightmares are like."

[governmentninja]

And from behind her, there's a rock that whizzes past Kelly's head, and skips on the water five times, before finally sinking.

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Turning her head just slightly, she regarded him with one brown eye for a moment before turning out to face the water again. "What's up, Kennedy? Did you need me to do something?" Please say you needed me to do something.

[governmentninja]

Leon regarded her in that calm, cool way of his.

"Do you need something to do? If I'm interrupting..."

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

The calm cool manner of his that she usually respected? Right now? It was really aggravating.

"Whatever keeps me awake." She sniffed derisively. "Does it look like you're interrupting?"

[governmentninja]

It was also keeping him sane. So deal, Kelly.

"Hard to tell. Some people like to be alone with their thoughts." He certainly did.

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

It wasn't as if she could scream 'Stop being so damn calm!' at him. That would have just been ridiculous.

"I'd rather not have to think. I'd rather move. My whole life I was a soldier. I went from one mission to the next, I did what I was ordered to do, I didn't have to think about who was right, who was wrong. They pointed me at something and I did it." She shrugged. "Now? The whole damn universe is being destroyed and we're stuck here on this goddamn ship with this Nightmare King thing. What the hell am I supposed to do?"

Picking up another rock, she threw it vehemently across the water. It made and angry whizzing sound as it flew, skipping quickly across the water at least a dozen times. Maybe that isn't really what's bothering her, Leon.

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"'Dangerous undercurrents.' You wouldn't think it from looking at this place, would you?" Wyn says lightly, inspecting the tin sign. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that there was something on Kelly's mind, and Wyn feels as if she at least owes the older woman a listening ear.

"Mind if I sit down?"

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Hearing the familiar voice, Kelly turned around to offer the girl a tight smile, shrugging a little. "That's generally the way of things isn't it? Nothing's ever what you expect it to be." And she was entirely sick of it.

"No, go ahead." She was silent for a moment before speaking again. "Can't sleep either?"

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

Wyn promptly sprawls on the ground next to Kelly, her legs out straight in front of her and propping herself up with her hands. "Don't think anyone can, unless they're lucky enough not to dream." she says, shaking her head. "Is it the nightmares or just something on your mind?"

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Her smile widened just a bit when Wyn sprawled out like that. Obviously, she didn't have any issues with making herself comfortable. "Don't think it's the dreams so much as the fact that everyone's afraid of them." Picking up another pebble, she threw it idly in a high arc into the water. Casting a glance at her friend, she shrugged. "Bit of both, I guess." Another pause. "Civilian relationships are...complicated."

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, well, we're famous for being a bit too complicated for our own good. What happened?" Wyn asks, sounding genuinely concerned. Her boots crunch the pebbles as she shifts position slightly to look at Kelly.

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

"I've noticed." She sighed, flicking a pebble away absently. For a tough soldier who always seemed to have everything under control, she sure seemed awkward. Maybe she was just tired. Shifting, she leaned her temple against her knees, looking back at Wyn and shrugging. "I don't know. I'm probably just tired. The things I'm thinking about don't even make sense to me."

[youngsoldat.livejournal.com]

Surprisingly enough, it had taken Erwin a few moments to notice Kelly. He was just as sleep-deprived, it not more so. His nightmares had been getting steadily worse. He was still seeing their faces when he woke up, catching movement on the edges of his vision. He was weary, bone-tired. And he couldn't sleep. He still remembered the screams as they'd shot them down. He remembered stacking frozen Russian bodies like cordwood to use as shelter from the wind. He remembered tanks rolling across the snow-covered steppe.

He blinked and glanced at Kelly, finally noticing her presence. He nodded at her, "...ah, sorry. I did not realize you were here."

[in-venting.livejournal.com]

Sometime after Leon had left, Sherry came in. The little girl was quiet as per her usual, but felt slower. Much slower. It was like her brain was doggy paddling instead of zipping along. Dark smudges were starting to form under her eyes. She hadn't exactly been forthcoming with her parents about her dreams (how did you explain that your biological monster of a father - literally - kept tearing your much more beloved adopted parents to bits? And then gave you a shoulder eyeball? Amongst other horrible things?), and the lack of sleep meant that she was burning through the books both Kelly and Claire had given her.

Still, she'd almost left and gone into a different sensorium when she realized that the one she'd picked was being used. Even if it was being used by one of her favorite people. Sherry hesitated at the door and then just as quietly padded in and sat down beside Kelly. "Is it okay if I stay in here a while?" she asked after a moment.

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Even after the girl had come in and sit down, Kelly didn't speak, simply holding her piece and watching Sherry take a seat. The weather cleared somewhat, but the cool wind still blew across the water. When she heard the question though, she brushed her fingers lightly over the bob of blonde hair beside her, surprisingly tender. "Of course. I haven't seen you in...forever." Which would probably be the biggest hint you would get that the giant Spartan woman has a huge soft spot for you missed you considerably, Sherry.

Looking down into the little girl's face, she frowned slightly. "You look worn out, Sherry. Haven't been sleeping well?"

[in-venting.livejournal.com]

"No," Leave it to the children to be honest. She didn't even flail at Kelly's hand the way she usually did at people who attempted to muss her hair. "But I'm trying to," Sherry added. "So Mom and Dad don't worry." Even if they were, and she could see it quite clearly.

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

"I looks like everyone's been losing sleep." To be fair, Kelly wasn't trying to muss her hair. It was more a petting motion, but she did know how Sherry was about her hair. "That's good. The whole Nightmare King thing has everyone on edge." She wrapped an arm around the girl's shoulder, urging her to lean against her a little, she looked dead tired.

"You've been keeping busy?"

[in-venting.livejournal.com]

She didn't resist, and her head fell against Kelly's shoulder, "I've been reading a lot. I finished all the books Mom got me, so I'm working through my reader that you gave me." She patted her bag with a gentle hand, mindful of the delicate piece of machinery inside. "I think the Nightmare King is stupid, and I just want him to leave me alone. Everyone else, too," she added as an afterthought.

"And studying. I've been trying to study, but I feel like I'm losing brain cells, or something, because nothing's sticking like it's supposed to." If the little girl sounded frustrated, it was because it was frustrating to know that you were smart, and felt so stupid.

[unsc-rabbit.livejournal.com]

The Spartan's arm slid easily around the girl's waist, shifting so they could get a little more comfortable. "Did you read through the one on the Battle of Thermopylae yet? It's one of my favourites." She was glad Sherry was enjoying the present, it made her feel slightly less useless. Some dormant part of her brain knew that simply making the girl happy was more than enough. But it wasn't a feeling she'd ever cultivated. And not one she could easily understand.

The arm around her waist squeezed gently, comfortingly. "You're just tired. It's hard to absorb new things when your brain just wants to rest for awhile." She sighed quietly. "I know the feeling. It's frustrating to know you can do something, but not be able to do it. Isn't it?"