trans_9 | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

Hey, this is a PSA for any and all aboard the good ship Stacy: today is your lucky day, because none other than West Rosen is gracing you all with his presence in the icky fleshy canteen. How about that: a great dinner and great company.

The dinner is goop on goop with a side of tray, and the company is picking at it with the expression on his face of someone being asked to eat live maggots.

Come distract him from the menu? Please?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Ah. Yes. The Robin thing. And the Gotham thing. Those things.

Rather wide-eyed, West takes a moment or two to answer.

Weakly, to Robin: "...psych?"

Ooooooooh!

"Aha, he missed the memo on the 'some stuff you think is fictional is real somewhere else,' didn't he," Kon says to Robin, figuring it out now. "Which I'm hoping means we see Wendy the Werewolf Stalker any day now..."

"He's working on it," Tim said with a laugh. He glanced at West. "Don't worry about it."

Oh good. Robin(!!!) doesn't resent him for being dumb.

West looks from one superhero to the other with an expression growing awe. Enjoy this, folks, because he doesn't often get excited about other people's awesomeness.

"You people weren't kidding?"

DUDE.

"For the record, Big Blue is exactly as awesome as he probably looks on TV or whatever."

No. No, they aren't kidding.

"And Batman is even more scary in person," Tim added with a laugh. "We definitely weren't kidding."

"Holy," says West decisively, "crap."

Then, because he doesn't feel that a single repetition quite casts light on the full incredibility of it all:

"Holy crap."

Because seriously.

"So-- all of that is real? Spiderman, Wonder Woman, Wolverine, everything?"

Kon quirks an eyebrow.

"Yeah on Wonder Woman, but I've never heard of those other guys. What kinda stupid name is 'Wolverine' anyway?"

Wrong company, West, and they retconned the crossover.

Tim shrugged a little. "No idea--but Wonder Woman, yes. And Batman, Superman, Flash and all the others."

And too bad about that retcon. Tim thought Jubilee was hot.

...What, says West's face. Seriously, you can't just let him get over the big weird things? You have to throw in little oddities and discrepancies to bother him as well?

"...You can't have just some comic books be real and the rest of them not."

(Although it'll make more sense when he actually thinks about it and combines it with the obvious 'alternate worlds' thing.)

"Say whut? Look, we're not comic book guys. How it works--at least how it was explained to us--is stuff happens to us, and somehow magically those events cross worlds and get shoved into the heads as some guys as ideas. They write it, and presto, we're fictional. In your world. But real in ours. Somewhere, you could be some guy on a TV show or something. So our world is what it is," Kon explains. "It's real, it's life or death, and good and bad. It might not match up entirely to the stuff you've read, you know?"

He goes on, "It's like Space Trek. You never see those guys go to the bathroom on the show, but just because you never see it doesn't mean they don't ever do it. I bet this means they're real somewhere, too."

That whole speech earns a sort-of-habitual "pff" sound of incredulity from West, although his expression is the real indicator of how he feels about this, and that is awed and tense and somewhat overwhelmed.

The most important message that's come across:

"But there's an actual Batman and Superman. And they go around fighting crime."

"They fight crime real good."

Tim grins. "Mmhm. And--really. Robin doesn't exist without Batman, so... If I exist? You can pretty much count on him existing, too. But--ah." He glances at Kon, laughing a little. "You probably don't want to meet him. He's not the friendliest guy."

"He has the, uh -- brooding thing going on?" offers West, whose brain is firmly set to 'holy shit'.

Kon starts to laugh so hard at that question he chokes on his slop.

Asking 'Does Batman brood?' is kinda like someone asking, genuinely, as if they don't know, 'Is the pope Catholic?'

"Um. Words don't really express it," Tim says, laughing. "He's also just... kind of grumpy with just about anyone who isn't family." He pauses. "And even sometimes with people who are."

They're laughing at him. :|

"It's a legitimate question!" he protests.

"If 'Is this sky blue?' a legitimate question, then sure, it's a legitimate question, too. 'Is grass green?' 'Does Superman fly?' 'Does Kid Flash have the attention span of a gnat on crystal meth?' 'Does the sun rise in the east?' 'Does a bear crap in the woods?'"

Tim elbows Kon a little. "Be nice. Yes. Batman broods. A lot. If it were an Olympic sport, he'd medal."

"What do you mean 'he'd medal'? Bats would bring home the gold."

"...Okay," admits West reluctantly, "I might've opened myself up for mockery with that question."

But you know. When you suddenly find yourself talking to real live superheroes about a real live Batman, it should probably be considered an impressive feat just to string an intelligent sentence together. West's brain keeps trying to tell him that he's going to wake up in a minute (although to be fair, at least part of it has been doing that since he first slithered out of his pod).

No, really. You shouldn't be laughing at him. Nobody should laugh at West. :(

"Naaah. I'm teasing a little. It's just, there's some stuff--like Bats being broody--that you can set your watch to. One of those facts of life kinda things."

He starts to float off.

"Aaannyway, I told Kara I'd got hang out with her, so I'll see ya' later. She's probably going to pout at me for taking so long as is."

Tim waves at him absently. "See you around," he says, before turning back to West. "He's not wrong, actually. Batman's kind of got brooding down to a science. He's practically famous for it. It's a big joke, with all of the younger heroes... and with a lot of the older ones, too," he admits.

"Uh, see you," West says to Kon's retreating form, still fairly overawed.

To Tim: "I know a couple of people like that. Only they tend to wear a lot more eye-makeup than I can really imagine the Dark Knight in."