trans_9 | Alcohol, the alternative to feeling like myself

The world was busy, and so fast. Always moving faster then Orc could move, or think. It seemed like life was passing in the slow solid blinks of his beady little eyes.

Ever since Howard's death he didn't feel as compelled to be useful. To take care of himself. What was the point really? They were all going to die sooner or later. And it's not like he deserved that second chance Howard was always going on about.

Howard...how long had it been? Between the drinking and Stacy's own peculiar grasp of time he had lost track.

But it didn't matter. All that mattered was forgetting. Forgetting where he was, forgetting what he was. Forgetting about Howard, Betty, home.

And so he kept drinking. And he kept moving. To stay in one place for too long risked trouble. People finding him, feeling bad for him. They were just being nice. But he didn't deserve nice. Not after what he'd done.

The city was perfect for this because there was so much of it. He didn't move fast, and he got tired easily. But he had plucked the beertree clean and drug a cooler with him. One of Howard's last gifts. Maybe Howard had more beer in the warehouse...he would have to stop there and see.

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More eye rolling, she was going to have a headache later. Though, she could probably convince Jinx to give her head a massage.

"It's a house with just one floor. I figure you're not too fond of stairs, right, Charlie?"

Orc frowned and nodded sullenly, because that was just one more reason to hate what he had become. Even houses with basements in them could be trouble if he stepped a little too hard and the floor wasn't solid enough.

"Wait...you want to find me a house?" The thought hadn't actually settled in his head yet and it seemed daunting. Sure kids were living on their own in the FAYZ but never Orc. Howard had always been around him.

"I only want to get away from here, and finding you a place to stay will make that happen." Bluntly honest, as always.

"You don't have to furnish it." She wondered if Orc knew what that meant either. "No one's saying you need to buy things for it. Just pick a place you can drag yourself to on a night and sleep."

She was such a strange girl. Orc knew he wasn't the fastest on the uptake but why would someone want an empty house?

"I'm sorry." It felt like the thing to say, after all she was really upset about the cave even if he hadn't known it was there. He also figured just apologizing wouldn't be good enough. Apologies never really seemed to amount to much. But it was all he could think to do other then follow her and try to put the cave out of his mind.

Alcohol, the alternative to feeling like myself

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