Daimon Hellstrom (
birthmural) wrote in
trans_92012-05-01 06:35 pm
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If I should die before I wake [Closed]
When he had been sedated and placed into the pods, Daimon Hellstrom's heart felt as though it were on fire. When he woke the pain had spread to his entire body. He had been released into one of the halls but he couldn't stand again. He didn't even have the strength to stay on his hands and knees and collapsed onto the floor.
"No." He whispered.
Daimon heard Stacy's gentle, encouraging voice in his head but not listening. He couldn't make out the words.
It was impossible to focus on anything but the pain. He couldn't remember where he'd been before now. He tried to clear his mind and focus but it was useless.
"Months," the word kept running through his mind. Why?
You're dying. And with the realization came other memories. His weakness, his chest pains, all symptoms he had ignored for as long as he could until he saw Dr. Hussain. Somehow, he knew he was dying. He could feel it but until she said "less than six months" he hadn't realized how quickly it was all happening.
Now that time was gone. He had spent it in the pods as Stacy tried in vain to heal him.
Daimon clawed at the floor but even his attempts to crawl failed.
Not yet. God, please not yet. Patsy. Let me see Patsy one more time.
"No." He whispered.
Daimon heard Stacy's gentle, encouraging voice in his head but not listening. He couldn't make out the words.
It was impossible to focus on anything but the pain. He couldn't remember where he'd been before now. He tried to clear his mind and focus but it was useless.
"Months," the word kept running through his mind. Why?
You're dying. And with the realization came other memories. His weakness, his chest pains, all symptoms he had ignored for as long as he could until he saw Dr. Hussain. Somehow, he knew he was dying. He could feel it but until she said "less than six months" he hadn't realized how quickly it was all happening.
Now that time was gone. He had spent it in the pods as Stacy tried in vain to heal him.
Daimon clawed at the floor but even his attempts to crawl failed.
Not yet. God, please not yet. Patsy. Let me see Patsy one more time.
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"I'm protecting everyone." Daimon shivered. The fever burned his body but he was still cold. "Including- my soul." His true soul. It was his true soul. He was not the monster, not the shadow. That had never been him. He was free of it now.
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"Don't take that from me. Let me die..."
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But if there was one thing she disliked, it was seeing someone give up on themselves, and their life. If she'd done that, who knew where she'd be right now. Perhaps in rehab, dealing with the insanity that her mother had put her through.
Patsy smacked Daimon across the face. Not hard, of course, but enough to sting a little bit. "Snap out of it," she said, the tone of her voice carrying shades of sadness and anger. "Darksoul or no, you've never been anything less than a man."
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"Half demon, half evil. You know this. The darksoul was inside you." How could she ask him to take that back? What gave her the right?
"I'm free. I want to die free."
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But then she'd also found this inexplicable something with Daimon, and she didn't want to lose that, either.
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All heroes make sacrifices. It is never easy.
He didn't say anything for a moment. It wasn't the darksoul he was battling but his body. He won and the world was clearer but he had to act now before it passed.
"I loved you from the moment I saw you." On ship or not that was true. "You are beautiful inside and out. You brighten everything you touch, including me."
He could stay with her. He could live by her side for however long the Ohm- or whatever new threat would emerge in time- would let them. They may even be happy for a time. But in the end it would sour. He would find some way to ruin it. No, not him- it. The darksoul, the monster he could not live without. The monster that was a part of him.
No more. He couldn't return to what he'd been. He had tasted the apple. He knew what it was like to be normal now. He didn't live in fear of losing control.
"But what you ask is impossible."
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"Patsy, please. I made my decision long ago." His voice was soft. He reached to touch her cheek.
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She opened her eyes and gently took Daimon's hand in hers. She gently kissed each of his knuckles and then asked,
"What about your Darksoul, Daimon? Without you, it might wreak havoc on the ship?
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"Without me it will die." Most likely. "The connection goes both ways."
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That didn't stop him from picturing the place in his mind. Daimon Hellstrom was skilled at shielding his thoughts from others but only when he could concentrate. Not even the Son of Satan could do that and cling to life at the same time.
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And she did. She understood exactly where his Darksoul was.
First moment she got, she was going to free that thing and save Daimon Hellstrom's life.
Even if it killed their relationship.
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"Patsy..."
Daimon's body burned. His soul's connection to life was rapidly fading. It was a struggle just to keep his eyes open and now he had to deal with his girlfriend going against him when he'd made his wishes clear.
He should have expected this. Why should dying be any easier than living?
"Don't."
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"I do. And I love you with all my heart, such as it is." That statement was worth more now that he was without his darksoul than it ever had been. Wasn't it?
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But that didn't mean that she wasn't going to do exactly what she needed to do to save his life.
"I know."
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Daimon closed his eyes and allowed himself to let go. He wasn't thinking about what Patsy might do anymore. He had to trust to his own abilities. The seals that kept the darksoul inside of the statue were strong. They would hold.
Lying there, dying, Daimon looked terrible and yet he had never looked more peaceful.
"Will you stay with me?" He asked quietly.
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Just as gently, telepathically, she attempted to help nudge him to sleep.
So that she could be evil and free the Darksoul.