trans_9 | Man, you look just like I feel [Open]

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Man, you look just like I feel [Open]

Despite the uproar that had taken place only a day earlier, it was all quiet at the Susono Inn. Well... mostly quiet, anyway. It was home to some of the most stubborn crew members on the ship, almost all of whom had gotten involved in the brawl with the Kessek.

Allenby's arm had been broken. Simon had taken a hard one directly to the ribs. Zouichi would probably take a week to get back to real fighting form.

And Howard... well, it would probably take Howard a while to recover from what had happened.

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"Okay. Good. Cool." He blanks out for a few seconds like he's just forgotten what he's doing and then snaps back to.

He takes Cedric's hand gently, not putting any unnecessary pressure anywhere. Medical did a good job with it, but Howard's picky. "Ew, this bandage job is so amateur."

"And you're the critic of all things medical, right?"

Cedric almost smiles. It doesn't hurt too much now. The bones were set and Howard's quite careful, which he appreciates. He just can't use it vigorously for a while.

He's more worried about Howard, to be honest. He'd nearly been free and...happy, and now they're back at square one. That has to be difficult, on top of the almost-torture. But Cedric can't work around to that unless he stays longer. Hmm.

"Yes. I'm the most critical medic. Medicritic. Scourge of all the shitty newbie medical people."

He heard about Sakura getting podded. Now Kaya's the only one he's somewhat close to in the department. The tight-knit family atmosphere he loved has officially disintegrated.

He lets Cedric have his hand back.

"I guess you've figured out that you're not getting the cats by now."

"Yeah, but they still spared me even worse." Cedric's just an athlete, he can't tell the difference. All he knows is that he'll be fine if he rests up.

They quickly come around to the major subject, and he bows his head.

"...yeah. But they didn't want me anyway. I was trying to play with them after...well, after. Before that, I tried to feed them."

He glances around for signs of the cats. Those little scamps had better behave for Howard.

The cats have been eating out of their food bowl, and at this point are comfortable enough with Cedric that they walk right up him to check out any new scents before joining Howard on the bed.

"I got to say I'm glad to still have them." That's one of the few good things about this. He takes a deep breath. "I just..."

He wouldn't have done it if he'd known. "I'm never going to be safe, am I?"

Awkwardly, the topics of conversation choose to show up at that moment! Cedric smiles at them, offering his good hand for sniffing. They can probably detect the changes, especially the lingering scent of the Kesseks who whomped him.

It's probably for the best that they're hanging out with Howard. A paw in the wrong place could hurt.

"I'm so sorry. I really hoped you two would be free." Even if part of him really likes Howard and will miss him terribly, he wants the guy to be happy. And that won't happen here, as much as Cedric wishes it could.

The unfairness of it all still tears at him. "Maybe after we do you know what. If they're gone, they can't..."

"I did too." He pets his cats and breathes deep, zoning out for a moment. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. Don't forget to breathe. He lies back down on the bed.

"Maybe. At least we'll get some more time together, right?" Howard tries to sound happy, and in actuality that is something good, but right now he sounds flat and affectless against.

Cedric settles further into his chair. He can't let it carry too much of his weight, as he quickly needs to make another adjustment to keep the pain at bay, but he needs to be propped up right now. Otherwise, he'd collapse and keep trying to sleep it off.

"Yeah. Maybe you'll even find a planet that will accept your cats," he offers as a shred of hope. The enthusiasm's not entirely there, though, as he'd miss them too.

"Do you want to lay on the bed? I don't mind." Howard's not really injured, bar the bruises on his wrist and the soreness in his arms.

"That planet better beware. Maybe Agrestic just dodged a bullet, not having to take us."

"Yeah. The next one might be even better for you. It can still work out."

Yeah, you can still leave, Howard. Cedric shuffles his feet awkwardly---but not too much. They're hovering around awkward territory now, but at least it's a distraction from the sadness.

"Are you sure I'd fit? I could lean off the side, or something." Cedric's been aware of his height for a while. It had taken his father quite a while to fit a bed that was long enough in the house---being the tallest of generations of Diggorys had its downsides.

"I'm not going to try again. That's final. I'm not...I can't risk it again. I wouldn't be able to handle it and it'd mess Orc up harder." He exhales in a deep, stuttered breath. "I can barely handle it now."

Howard gets up off the bed. "Is that a short joke?" It's hard to tell if Howard's seriously offended or if he's just messing with Cedric (he's just messing).

"No, it's an 'I'm entirely too tall and awkward' joke," Cedric corrects, awkwardly lying down on the bed once it's clear. He keeps his face turned away, as the flare-ups of pain can get ugly.

When Cedric settles, he looks back at Howard and takes the pain in. It breaks his heart, and in that second Cedric's smacked in the face with how selfish his desires have been. "We'll throw them out, and the Muggles will fix the A.I. thing. We have to. How many more horrible rules did they neglect to tell us about?"

"Well, you are tall and awkward. Not going to argue with that." Howard gets up, letting Cedric have the length of the bed, and sits fetal-style on the chair.

It's hard to feel enthusiastic about the future right now. Especially hard to feel up to taking a risk again. Howard zones out and stares at a particularly interesting fold in the blankets before coming back to. "I don't know. I guess I don't really care. It's done now. Nothing happened to me. I'm okay."

Cedric nods shakily. It's one of the few actions that doesn't really hurt at all. "You're going to be all right. In a little while."

Is that an argument? Maybe.

"What if I'm not? What if some day it's the final straw?" He wrings one hand out with the other, as if trying to squeeze the shakes out. "When's enough enough?"

"You're not there yet. I wish I knew, I wish I could reassure you better," he whispers in a rush. It's a painful thought.

"But I'm here. Your cats are here. Your friends are here. I know it's not much, but..."

"People snapped where I'm from." Howard shrugs. He's not that far yet. He doesn't know if it's possible to get that far, for him. He's mean and heartless and sometimes even cruel, but he's never been prone to that sort of sadism.

"You're here." A hint of a smile passes over his mouth.

"That doesn't mean you will, not necessarily." Cedric insists on hanging onto hope, almost always. It's probably fairly annoying by now.

"And that's right. You've got an awkward too-tall sort of guy hanging around. Hope that doesn't bother you too much."

"No, it doesn't bother me." It's at points like this that Howard wishes he and Cedric could have something more. He doesn't know what's okay and what's not with this friendship - but then again, he wouldn't know with a relationship either.

"Could I, um. Nevermind, you're hurt right now."

Cedric props himself up on one elbow with some effort. He's hurt, but he's not incapable of doing anything at all!

"Could you...what? I won't know if I can do it unless you ask."

"Do you mind if we hug for a second? I mean, gently and all."

That's all? Cedric had begun to picture something truly monstrous. Honestly, compared to some of the things, a hug sounds wonderful. Maybe Cedric needs one too---after all this mess, who wouldn't?

He nods and pushes himself back up, finding a position he can hold while they do this. "Not at all, come on then."

Cedric smiles and opens his arms. He certainly looks happier, if not by much.

Howard's a person for whom hugs are reserved for traumatic events or holidays, so he's not totally sure why Cedric's smiling like he is. He embraces Cedric, gently and more around the shoulders than around the banged-up torso.

"Thanks. I'm glad you're okay."

Because most people find hugs comforting and enjoyable, Howard. Maybe you'll get there someday---but Cedric's happy with this for now. They both need a little support at the moment.

He hesitantly rests his bad arm on Howard's back, staying far away from the arms and shoulders. They're bound to still be sore after all that hanging.

"You too." But that should be self-evident by now. Cedric's gone and revealed the stupid lengths he will go to in attempts to protect Howard, and something about that knowledge is definitely awkward.

Howard possibly holds the hug for slightly too long before pulling back away. It is awkward. He's not sure they'll ever reach a point where they aren't awkward around each other.

"Do you want some tea or something? I could heat up water."

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