trans_9 | Same Old Routine (Closed)

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Same Old Routine (Closed)

Elfangor could sympathize. He could understand very well with Sam's anger and hatred for the Yeerks. There were plenty of personal and impersonal reasons he had to want every single Yeerk dead. He's even dealt with showing mercy to Yeerks making things worse. However...

He never wanted to become like the Yeerks. He never wanted his own selfish desires overrun what was the better road to walk. That's why he kept his honor and why he enforced the honorable beliefs in any arisths he took under his wing. He had dealt with a few who were particularly bloodthirsty in the past, so he thought that perhaps he could get through to this Sam.

Or at least get him to eat properly.

< Sam Winchester? > Elfangor said in thoughtspeak, stopping in front of Sam's holding cell.

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"That's me," Sam answered from where he sat on his bed, his legs propped up with his dad's journal splayed out in front of him. He'd spent the last few hours writing in it, jotting down seemingly random things with a pen he'd had brought to him from one of the Precinct's offices.

Elfangor introduced himself. < I have heard that you are on a hunger strike, because you are against the Yeerk living? ?

"Wow, news travels fast on this bucket," he answered, only glancing up from the journal pages for a moment. "I figured it take at least another week."

Elfangor explained, not quite sure if Sam was being sarcastic or not.

(http://s225.photobucket.com/albums/dd304/mysterio2000/Sam%20Winchester/?action=view&current=SPN-Icons-supernatural-1390888-1-1.jpg)

"Well," Sam sighed. "Considering you're like the third person, aside from Dean, to come down here to tell me that, I'd say it's a pretty damn good course of action. Seems to be working anyway."

< No, it's not. What it has done has gotten people to be concerned about your health, both physical and mental. There has been no mention whatsoever of just listening to your desires and killing the Yeerk. We are still performing a proper trial and whatever is decided then will be final. > Elfangor explained calmly.

(http://s225.photobucket.com/albums/dd304/mysterio2000/Sam%20Winchester/?action=view&current=Supernatural-supernatural-141534-1.jpg)

"I guess that just means you're gonna have to keep me locked up here indefinitely then, doesn't it?"

He was clearly being just as stubborn with Elfangor as he had been with Leon.

< That may be the case, > Elfangor said. < Have you thought about it, Sam, how you look to everyone else? >

Elfangor is good at being patient. And he knows a few tricks for dealing with stubborn.

(http://s225.photobucket.com/albums/dd304/mysterio2000/Sam%20Winchester/?action=view&current=Supernatural-supernatural-141534-1.jpg)

He was quiet for a moment. Of course, he'd thought about. He'd thought about it every day since he'd woken up in the medbay and finally began to put the pieces of his scrambled brain together. But, then he'd gotten the answer...

"I don't have to think about," Sam replied. "I already know what they think about me. And, trust me, this hasn't made it any worse than it already was."

< Then tell me, what do you think they see, when they look at you? > Elfangor asked.

(http://s225.photobucket.com/albums/dd304/mysterio2000/Sam%20Winchester/?action=view&current=tats7.png)

"A murderer."

< No, > Elfangor said. < You're not a murderer. What you appear is much worse. A murderer will at least show concern for their own life. What they see is a man who is so desperate, so consumed by his hatred and anger, that he is willing to die on the hope that maybe someone will kill what he cannot kill himself. Someone so bloodthirsty that they would do anything they could for blood. > He paused, letting those words sink in. < And those who were infected like you see someone who is still letting the Yeerk control them. >

"Look," Sam said, tossing his father's journal aside and swiftly rising to his feet. "You're not saying anything I haven't already heard, so why are you even here, huh? You obviously aren't here to listen because none of you have listened to a damn thing I've said since this whole thing started so why the hell should I even waste my breath?"

He glared at Elfangor, but it wasn't just the Andalite that Sam was angry with. No, Elfangor shared that with several people. "This isn't about anger or hatred, got it? Will I be happy to see that thing die, damn straight I will but that isn't what got me in here and that isn't the reason I'm not eating.

"That thing is a threat, got it? I've seen what they can do. I know what it's like to have them use to hurt people and all you can do is scream inside your head for them to stop. I know what's it like to watch yourself hold someone else's head down in the pool so they can go through what you've been going through for weeks. And I know what it's like to wake up and realize all the horrible things you were made to do and you couldn't do a goddamn thing about it."

He paused.

"Now, you wanna call that anger and hatred, then fine. Maybe it is. I call it knowing what someone else will have to go through when that thing gets loose. And when I look at all the kids on this ship and think about them getting put through what I and others went through then, yeah, killing that thing starts to look like right thing to do. And if it takes me starving myself to death to make you guys see that, then fine, that's what it takes. Because I'd rather do that than have to face the person that thing infests next and have to try to find a way to say I'm sorry."

There was another pause as Sam continued to stare intently at Elfangor.

"You've fought these things for a long time, I know. But if you think a whole planet full of Yeerks is dangerous, just wait 'til you see what one Yeerk with nothing to lose can do. Especially when it's got a bunch of super-powered kids to pick from. You think any of us would stand a chance in Hell if that thing got its slimy tentacles on Superboy or Supergirl?

"That's why I'm down here. That's why I'm not eating. That's why I'm so desperate. And this is the last time I'm gonna say it."

Elfangor listened patiently, letting Sam let it out before he looked at him calmly.

 He said. < You are right, that is a danger and it very well could happen. >

Then he waited to explain, making sure Sam did hear what he said.

Ok, so Sam wasn't exactly expecting Elfangor to agree with him, Andalite or not.

"Well, there's a first."

Elfangor answered.

< War Prince Alloran. He is the only Andalite to be taken alive by the Yeerks. And it was because of a combination of my mercy and my foolishness that he was taken. >

He had already admitted it when he thought he was to die. Loren knew. Tobias and Aximili deserved to know if they didn't already. He had no secrets to hide.

"Yeah, well, being 'taken alive' will be the least of our worries if that thing gets hold of someone we can't stop," Sam said. "That's when people die. The only reason the Yeerks didn't try to take them last time was because there was no way they could hold 'em when the slug had to feed. Schmuz doesn't have to worry about that because he's the last. He's not going to be able to hold anyone longer than three days. Which means he has every reason to grab the strongest one of us and take as many of us down with him as he can."

< Except that's not how Yeerks work, generally speaking. > Elfangor said. < And any Yeerk who might try that, he's already proven he's not by surrendering. Schmuz wants to live. Yeerks are generally very concerned for themselves, very selfish. It's why they can take hosts without guilt, usually. He will go for any chance he has to live and going on a massacre will not do that. More than likely, he'd go for one of the engineers in hopes of making a Kandora Generator. >

"Maybe," Sam conceded the point. "But the chance that you're wrong comes with a lot of dead bodies. The chance that I'm wrong comes with one. Which is more important to you: the life of one Yeerk or the lives of a lot of the people on this crew?"

Elfangor said simply. < While I have never been infested, I have seen how bloodthirsty Yeerks can be. A Yeerk alone is no threat, if it has no chance to live without our mercy. I can guarantee it. >

"No, you can't," Sam rebuffed. "And you know it."

< No, I can. Because if the Yeerk is deemed to live, I will be checking on it everyday to make sure it is where it is supposed to be and if I find it missing, I believe there are a number of psychics on board who will be able to quickly find the Yeerk and disable it. > Elfangor said seriously. < As I've said, I know the risks. I know what can go wrong. That is why I will be making sure it does not. >

"Just one problem. The way I heard it, the psychics were only able to find the Yeerks. They couldn't disable them or override their control. Which doesn't do us a whole hell of a lot of good if it takes someone that could kill ten or twelve us before anyone else realizes what's going on."

< Then the important question is, how could it end up that someone no one can stop will happen to get infected? It is not easy to infect between hosts. Usually it required one to be unconscious if one is transferring to a dangerous host. >

"I dunno. I guess there would have to be someone on the ship who wanted to let it out," Sam answered. "Someone like, I dunno, maybe whoever's actually running the thing?"

Elfangor has to stare at Sam with all four eyes for a good minute at that.

"Probably. But why don't you give it a shot anyway."

< First and foremost is the Yeerk mentality again. Yeerks are egomaniacs and believe themselves supreme. Even if Schmuz was released, if he was likely to 'take out as many as he could with him,' he is more likely to go after the one to 'dare use him' or the one who essentially killed him by taking him out of stasis. > Elfangor explained. Yeerks did not often listen to anyone else who wasn't a Yeerk of a higher rank unless they were about to be killed by said person.

< Secondly...there are worse things than Yeerks, Sam Winchester. Yeerks is what I fight, but I know of far, far worse. And if Stacy, this ship, has the power I believe she has, then Stacy can have those beings. If this person can release the Yeerk from stasis, that alone shows we are doomed because we know not everything is kind on this ship. This person could release one of those beings that are and are more of a problem to get rid of. Not to mention that if they forcibly infested someone, it's likely because they can control the limbs of the ship. The ones that grab people when they commit Violations and have proven to restraint most everyone from my understanding. Simply put, Sam Winchester, if you are worried about the person in control of this ship, Schmuz the Yeerk is the least of your problems. >

"Small problems have a knack for becoming big problems," Sam replied, still refusing to budge.

"And if you guys wanna roll the dice and gamble on the Yeerk's mentality, then do it. Obviously, I can't stop you. But I'm not gonna be here to see it. I don't care what you say, I don't care what you do, I'm not backing down and I'm not gonna let you gamble with my life just so you can have a clear conscience. I'd rather die here, in this cell, on my own terms than out there on yours."

< Like you seem intent to become. > Elfangor said, though his tone was calm and firm.

Elfangor stared at him again. And then he did something rather odd.

He laughed. Or it would seem he laughed. It sounded like a laugh in thoughtspeak anyway.

"What the hell are you laughing at?"

< Most everything you said. > Elfangor said. 

< First and foremost, this does not give me a clear conscience. In fact, I would be quite happy to see the slug die. But I risk too much in losing my honor code and none of it is losing sleep at night from guilt. > Elfangor explained. < Secondly, the fact you think any of these terms belong to either you, or me, or anyone of the crew. Thirdly, the fact you think you are really in control of your actions when you fail to see you are still under Yeerk control. I heard the Yeerk made you shoot yourself in the head, correct? Quite ironic that you're finishing the job for him. >

Low blows. All of them terrible and low, but in the end, they were truth. And if it took a bitter truth to do what he needed to do, he would.

Sam's body visibly stiffens. If it weren't for the bars, he would likely have lunged at the Andalite right then and there, not caring that he hadn't eaten in days, not caring about the massive blade on the end of its tail.

But, the bars were there and Sam merely stepped, slowly and purposefully, up to them. "Get the f*#@ out of here. Now."

Elfangor looked at him calmly. < No. > He said, stepping closer to the bars, looking at Sam's eyes with all four of his own. < Because I know exactly how my universe runs, Sam Winchester, and how very much a part of it you are now that you have made your destiny part of a Yeerk's. >

"I said: Get. Out," Sam repeated, his voice was low and deep and almost threatening.

< You are scrambling for control. That is all this is, isn't it? Control that you have lost because of the Yeerk. You want to kill the Yeerk in a way to show the Yeerk that tried to kill you that he isn't in control, that you can kill those slugs easily. > Elfangor said, not looking away and not moving. < That didn't work and you lost control again, so now you are starving yourself to say you will die on your terms. Now I have questioned your control, so you wish me gone to convince yourself that everything is on 'your terms' when really, they are on the Yeerk's term, the term of the Yeerk who tried to kill you. >

He paused. < And perhaps the most ironic is, he was a puppet just like you. Just like EVERYONE of any true importance to the fate of my universe is manipulated. And by not separating yourself from those two Yeerks, you have submitted yourself to that control, by those in my universe who use us as only game pieces. Take your chance to get out of that cycle now, because I assure you, you'll be lucky if you ONLY starve to death. >

(http://s225.photobucket.com/albums/dd304/mysterio2000/Sam%20Winchester/?action=view&current=Supernatural-supernatural-141534-1.jpg)

Sam spends several seconds glaring at Elfangor, using the time to calm himself a bit, fighting back the urge to reach through the cell door and slam his blue head against the bars.

"You've said what you came to say," he finally said, turning and walking back over to his bed.

"It's the Yeerk or me. That's the only way this works and its the only way this ends."

< Then you will be Crayak's pawn. > Elfangor said. < Because you have made your fate be connected to his side of the board and he cares nothing as long as he can win. >

He paused. < Though, I suppose there are ways to feed coma patients. I will be suggesting that if you don't eat soon that we use...Superboy or Supergirl, the ones you mentioned, to forcefully pin you to have you sedated and fed through a feeding tube. If you are willing to submit to Crayak's control, I suppose I will have to play the part of the Ellimist's pawn to make sure you will not die. If it's your wish to be part of our universe, I will make it so. >

"You're welcome to try."

Elfangor shook his head. A human habit. < Then I will say this. Until the time comes you separate yourself from my universe, I will make sure you live, no matter what the cost. Because my part is to make sure the Yeerks do not succeed in anyway I can in any of their endeavors while maintaining the honor code. >

Meaning he's never gonna leave you alone, Sam.

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Same Old Routine (Closed)

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