trans_9 | Never tickle a sleeping Basilisk

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Never tickle a sleeping Basilisk

Sirius hadn't had much time to adjust. He'd hardly returned from the Multiverse's Next Top Model when GLaDoS grabbed him. And then when she finally let him go it was in a place of the ship he'd never seen before. Perhaps that was a blessing. Better to explore than to brood, as he had been inclined to do while he ran mazes.

Sirius didn't walk for very long before he came to something strange, or rather something out of place. He paused and stared at a set of sinks for about a minute before realizing why it looked so familiar. It was similar to the ones at Hogwarts- at least on certain levels. Not any in the men's rooms, probably one of the girl's. He had been in them several times to be sure there weren't any hidden passages and he hadn't found any. But this- this was different. The one sink had fallen away completely, revealing only a pipe. But then it couldn't be a Hogwarts sink, could it? Even if Sirius had missed the entrance then James or Remus ~~or Peter~~ would have found it. How could they miss something like this?

Sirius approached the sink and gazed down into the pipe. It was large enough to fit through. A secret entrance if ever he'd seen one though not very hygienic. As if that was going to stop him.

"Lumos." The light from Sirius's wand illuminated only several feet of grime coating the pipe but the pipe itself continued further.

Clearly there was only one logical thing to do. Jump in. Sirius's honor was at stake, after all, and all of the Marauders'. They had searched every inch of Hogwarts castle and grounds. They thought they had discovered everything. If this really was from Hogwarts then one of the Marauders, in this case Sirius, had correct this oversight.

Sirius stepped up to the pipe, took a deep breath, and practically jumped inside. Even if the pipe was old and covered in slime, the rush of air over his body was exhilirating. He had no idea what was about to happen next, where he would land (hopefully not on a set of spikes), or if anything was waiting for him (he would not be disappointed).

Sirius let out a laugh like a bark and the noise traveled up through the pipes, echoing above while he fell further below until finally he hit the damp stone floor at the bottom. He stood, brushing himself off, and looked up into the dark pipes. There was no clear way of how he would get back but he was not too concerned about it.

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Sirius also changed back and took his wand out of his mouth. He wiped it off on his sleeve before raising it. It was still glowing from his lumos spell, waiting for the word nox. Right now it provided the only light source in the tunnel.

"As long as you can can hold your own I have no problems." He said to Roger before looking at Marco. "It's handy for exploring but I'd rather stay as I am now if I can help it. I can't use my wand as a dog and I can't talk either. You'll have to tell me how you can when you're transformed after we're finished here."

"Dude, that's almost the scariest ability of all," Marco said, grinning. "The scariest being the ability to transform into a gym teacher."

He shrugged at Sirius. "It just comes with the morphing," he said, keeping any explanations vague. "But hey, I don't need to worry about a stick when I'm morphed. I can do plenty of exploring." And with that he started morphing again, but this time to bat. For a cavern like this, it was the best morph.

Somehow he'd ended up forgetting that he hadn't actually wanted to come exploring at all in the first place.

"I've fought giant scorpions, desert raiders, and angry Deathclaws," said Roger dryly, gesturing towards the weapons he carried on his back. "And this is good armor in good repair. I'll manage, I think."

The bat thing was an interesting trick. Large animals with close-to-human body weight were one thing, but where the hell was that kid's mass going?

"Stick? A stick? This is my wand, idiot. Call it that again and I'll shoot you down. Stick..." He grumbled and started walking forward, not waiting for the others to follow. "If we run into anything you'll be glad I have it with me."

Muggles. They didn't know any better. It was no use getting mad at them.

Roger, you really didn't want to know. Marco still tried to not think to hard about all the the blobs of Marco-mass that would just float around z-space whenever he morphed small.

<Oooh, thank goodness for the stick. Please, oh great holder of the stick, protect me!> Marco said after he'd finished morphing into bat. He launched into the air, darting ahead of Sirius and flitting around all over the place so that he'd be harder to hit - just in case Sirius did try to shoot him down.

"We're in unfamiliar territory in an area where something carnivorous lives, in an unknown part of the ship, with no way of communicating with anyone else," Roger snapped. "Could we please refrain from giving each other a hard time until after we figure out what our next move is?"

Pause.

"Because I'm pretty sure I can hear something nasty moving around out there," he added, and reached up to switch on the light attached to the side of his helmet.

"You're absolutely right." Sirius said right before he hexed Marco. The spell was only mildly inconvenient, if not very pleasant. Bat Marco might feel a sudden, overwhelming vertigo for several seconds before Sirius ended the spell.

"That settles everything." He said brightly.

Marco swerved suddenly, slamming into the side of the cavern once before spinning around dizzily.

<...I meant to do that,> he said.

Roger almost answered. Almost. What he saw ahead, though...

He held up one fist in the 'everybody stop now' gesture he'd used in the Army, and froze. His helmet lamp, and to a lesser degree Sirius' wand, cast a faint glow into an enormous, faintly green-litten chamber. Pairs of pillars thick as a man, carved all over with snakes and serpentine designs, stretched away into the gloom. The whole place had an air of chill, of gloom and shadow, and frankly, he didn't like the sight of it one bit.

He reached over his shoulder for the laser rifle, just in case.

Though unfamiliar with the gesture, guessed what it meant and stopped. He also gazed into the chamber and immediately recognized it.

He swore. "It's the Chamber of Secrets." Why it didn't occur to him before he didn't know. He couldn't count the hours he'd spent looking for this place. He thought it was a myth. Now here he was standing in the lair of Salazar Slytherin and his monster. What any of his relatives would do to be in his place.

This was an incredible discovery and he didn't regret for a moment following his urge to explore. He did regret bringing two muggles with him. He didn't know what creature Slytherin left in here but he knew it wouldn't be friendly. He also knew that if it had survived this long it would be nearly impossible to kill.

"Get behind me."

<The Chamber of what now?> Marco said. That did not sound good, and Marco was definitely getting a sense of that things were seriously not good right now.

Why were they doing this, again?

He fired off some clicks, trying to 'see' what was out there. When the clicks bounced back, Marco's blood ran cold.

<Guys, there is something seriously big out there that is moving towards us,>

Roger swore under his breath. "You recognize the place," he said tersely, falling in behind Sirius. "What's both huge and likely to be in here?"

It was unfamiliar ground, and he didn't like it one bit.

"I don't know." Words Sirius spoke rarely. "Slytherins are snakes and Salazar was supposedly a Parselmouth. Maybe- some kind of snake? Or-"

At that moment something stirred behind them. Scales rustled against the floor. Sirius turned and caught sight of the creature's side as it moved back into the shadow, circling them.

He let loose a stream of curses that would make a sailor blush.

"It's a Basilisk. Close your eyes! If it looks into your eyes you're dead. CLOSE YOUR EYES RIGHT NOW."

As soon as he finished speaking the Basilisk reared forward. It was shaped like a snake but grossly distorted in size, at least 50 feet. Its fangs were doubly lethal, not only capable of puncturing bone but delivering venom that only phoenix tears could cure. Its beaming yellow eyes were death to look upon directly.

Sirius shouldn't have bragged about the powers of his wand. The Basilisk's scales reflected magic. Sirius didn't have much faith in whatever technology the Muggle had with him.

They were dead. There was no way they were going to live through this. The only one of them who had a chance at surviving this was Marco if he flew away fast.

The realization sent a wave of fear through Sirius's body. His wand hand shook. He grasped his wand tighter and his hand stilled. They weren't dead yet. Sirius had brought the others here. Their lives were his responsibility. He would protect them until he breathed his last. He would die a Gryffindor.

<A snake? That thing's a giant snake?!> Marco said, incredulous. Except now that it was closer, the bat's echolocation was showing that Sirius was telling the truth.

There was a giant goddamn snake that apparently could kill them by looking into their eyes coming after them.

<Okay I know people talk about 'if looks could kill', but this is insane!> he said, flapping around madly. At least he was lucky - in this morph, he didn't need eyes to see. Not that being able to see was at all reassuring. <Oh man, it's getting closer...>

"Oh, hell's bells-"

Roger was facing in the right general direction, and the thing was the size of a building. The way he saw it he stood a good chance of laying some pain down on the thing even if he fired wildly, so he took the best aim he could manage before closing his eyes and rapidly squeezing his rifle's trigger several times. If he was lucky, the red laser would at least damage the thing's scales somewhat- concentrating fire on a patch of hide worked wonders with Deathclaws, after all.

Just as Roger fired the Basilisk swerved closer to its prey- and out of the lasers line of fire. The light however, did cause it to rear back and hiss instead of striking at them.

Sirius risked a glance at the creature, keeping his line of sight close to the floor. Once he saw its position he shut his eyes again. He raised his wand at what was hopefully the Basilisk's eyes.

"Conjunctivitis."

Luck was not on his side, at least not in this instance. The spell struck the Basilisk's body and the scales repelled it back onto Sirius.

"SON OF A-" Out of instinct, Sirius dropped his wand and raised his hands to his swollen eyes.

<Dude, aim more to the right, it's moved out of your line of...what the hell was that? You idiot, what are you doing?> Marco said, changing track from trying to direct roger to wonder what the hell Sirius was doing when that...whatever that was happened.

But as much as Marco wanted to yell at Sirius for a while, he didn't have time for that. The thing was still coming for them, and since the genius with the stick had managed to take himself out he was gonna be in serious trouble. And not the kind he could make a fun pun about.

<If this thing eats me, I am so going to come back and haunt you. And your stick!> Marco yelled as he launched himself towards the basilisk and flying in circles around it's head in an attempt to distract it.

"Aiming right!" Roger snapped, eyes still closed and hoping like hell nobody got in the way. "Firing!"

The AER9 laser rifle is not an automatic weapon. It is, however, a weapon that can get twenty-four good shots in a row off a single microfusion cell, as fast as the operator's finger can repeatedly squeeze the trigger.

If Marco's aerobatics didn't distract the monstrous snake, the barrage of laser fire probably would.

The bat was of small concern to the Basilisk, at least at first. But it kept flying between it and its prey, blocking any attempts at eye contact. The Basilisk turned, slowly judging when to strike and close its jaws over the tiny creature when the laser grazed its scales. This was neither magic nor sword and though it did not seriously injure the Basilisk, the laser cut through its scales and weakened it.

The Basilisk's hiss grew louder and turned into an unearthly scream. It had slept for too long under the depths of the school, feeding its hunger more with hatred than with things that breathed. Now, when it could finally loose that hatred and sate its hunger, it was thwarted.

Recovering from the pain, the Basilisk dove for the bat. Drops of venom fell from its fangs.

While the others fought Sirius had fallen to his knees, less groping and more flailing as he tried to find his wand. He was not so much oblivious to the struggle going on around him as unable to think beyond his state of agony.

"FINITE INCANTATEM! FINITE-" The scorching pain in his eyes eased. He had the brief urge to sit back and cry at the new found relief. Then he remembered the Basilisk, the reason for his act of complete and utter stupidity.

He kept searching for his wand. It may be useless offensively but there was no reason he couldn't cast defensive spells, though he had little hope they would last long against the Basilisk. Why had he tried to cast a spell on the creature? He got an O on his Defense Against the Dark Arts N.E.W.T. He'd fought Death Eaters and lived. He'd ran alongside a werewolf for countless full moons. How stupid could he-

While he berated himself mentally his hands found not his wand but a battered hat. He forced his eyes open and was suddenly aware that there were tears streaming down from them. In that moment he was thinking many things. Mostly he was worried about fighting the Basilisk and keeping the others alive. But there were two other thoughts: one, that the hat he held was the Sorting Hat; and two, even if he was crying from sheer pain he did not want the others to see him in such a state. He didn't know if what he did next was out of pride and vanity or because of an odd compulsion (or both) but he placed the Sorting Hat on his head.

When Roger had started shooting Marco had cursed, flying up to try and dodge the beams. But soon after, he had bigger problems to deal with - namely, the giant monstrous snake that was now trying to eat him.

<AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!> Marco yelled, now focused not on distracting the Basilisk but on getting the fuck away from this thing.

Oh man he did not want to get eaten. He'd been eaten before. It was not fun.

Crap, crap, crap, there were only two shots left-

"Hey! Hey, you!" Roger shouted in the snake's direction, eyes still closed. "Try picking on somebody your own size!"

He squeezed the trigger twice more, and in a swift, practiced series of motions returned his gun to its moorings and tore the supersledge loose. The mass of the creature lay directly ahead. It'd be a damned hard thing to miss, and if he heard it rearing up or changing position to strike, he'd hopefully have enough time to twist out of its way. You didn't get far wielding a sledge if you couldn't pivot fast enough to give the thing serious momentum.

What followed was not a series of events he would much care to remember in times to come. The blasted Basilisk was easily as fast as a Deathclaw, or perhaps faster, and he had scarcely any warning at all of its motion or impending strike. The massive hammer didn't so much land a blow on its scales as provide a pivot point for Roger to spin around when the first fang strike came his way, and then the second; the third saw him simply drop to the floor and roll in as tight a ball as a man in his armor could manage. He was almost positive he heard the thing's fangs snapping just behind him as he came up out of it.

How long he could keep this up, at his age and with the monstrous snake that angry, he didn't know. He wasn't going to think about that. He just had to keep it off the kid until somebody figured out how to take the wretched thing down for good.

The pain in Sirius's eyes was gone, or rather ignored. The adrenaline coursing through his body quickly masked the pain. Now all his thoughts were directed toward the Basilisk and saving his crewmates.

He stood, still wearing the hat, and stumbled forward. That was when he felt something fall out of the Sorting Hat onto the floor. He could tell by the sound that it was metallic. He pulled off the Sorting Hat and looked down. There at his feet was a sword. The hilt bore several rubies. As Sirius grasped it he saw a name engraved on the blade: Godric Gryffindor.

Sirius didn't waste any time contemplating what had happened. He kept his eyes low to the ground, slowly following the sounds of the battle until he saw the body of the Basilisk. He held his breath as he raised his gaze higher until he saw that he was behind the Basilisk.

He moved forward as quietly and quickly as he dared. With the Basilisk's full attention away from him it did not notice that he was now directly behind its head. He leapt onto its body, raised the sword over his head and brought it down, slicing over its head. The Basilisk rolled aside, knocking Sirius off and nearly crushing him. It turned its head to face him but the danger was gone. The sword had shredded the eyes.

Reeling and shrieking, the Basilisk slithered past them and retreated into the shadows.

Sirius panted and clutched his rapidly bruising side. "I cut off the Basilisk's eyes but it's not dead yet. You can open your eyes."

The moment Roger had started distracting it, Marco hadn't wasted any time in trying to fly further away from the Basilisk. He'd just started to wonder what the hell they were going to do next (because even if it wasn't trying to eat Marco it had a pretty good shot at Roger), when Sirius had appeared.

<Oh good, we can open our eyes!> Marco said, flapping down to where Sirius and Roger where. <We were all nearly eaten by an overgrown snake, but we can open our eyes. You do realise that snakes can still smell us and sense heat, right? Believe me, I've been one. Even without it's eyes, that thing is fully capable of coming back and killing us.>

"If we can see it, we can fight it properly," Roger said, panting. "That thing was angry. Is there anywhere on its body we can hurt it besides the eyes?"

If nothing else... well, if it had a head, then it had a body part vulnerable to massive amounts of force. Maybe if Marco went gorilla again...

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