Dr. Daniel Jackson (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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trans_92011-10-02 11:52 pm
hi_there_aliens) wrote in trans_92011-10-02 11:52 pm
A Mini-Midlife Crisis
Where to start? He had to resist the urge to pick at the little square bandage on his forehead or the stitches. Daniel put his hands on his hips, where they couldn't get anywhere near his head, and surveyed what was going to temporarily be his domain. Until he got kicked out, at least, but until then, he was determined to squat here. As makeshift archaeology labs went, he'd worked with less. It was a lot to take in; there were an impressive amount of artifacts from the dig. They probably didn't even scratch the surface of Taleen, but they'd brought back a lot anyway. The room was crowded. Practically overflowing. An archaeologist's wet dream. Maybe not Meaning of Life Stuff, but this could keep a person occupied for months. Maybe years, depending on how thoroughly you wanted to go into it.
Daniel didn't make any motion to begin on any of them. He sat down and looked at the tables.
What the hell was he even doing here? Once the excitement and rush wore off, Daniel realized how inappropriate this was. Talk about a lack of priorities. The fact that he was still thrilled about the prospect of spending a day studying them angered him at the same time as it excited him. Sha're was out there, still a host. Or maybe not, if his universe really had been destroyed. Daniel had a hard time wrapping his head around the concept. Part of him still didn't believe it was true. He wanted proof. Something besides Stacy and the Daligig's word. At the same time, having actual proof only meant that what felt like a terrible possibility became cold, hard fact. Maybe he didn't want to know. It was easier on his sanity if he could wonder if SG-1 was out there still.
And here he was, about to get arm deep in relics and a dead civilization. Like it had any bearing on what was supposed to be the most important thing. He should be trying to get back home or - or do something to help everything and everyone he ever cared about.
Sure thing, as soon as he found some good options. So far, Daniel didn't see anything better than staying on this ship. Even if he found a Stargate, it wasn't like he could abandon ship. It wasn't a matter of attachment but practicality. Where would he go? No point of origin, or maybe they were different, and even if he went back to this Earth, nothing was quite the same. It wasn't his universe. He was better off sticking with Stacy, Daniel had to admit to himself. Everything seemed to converge on her. If anything was going to come up that would help, it would more likely happen around her. That left him doing missions while he was on board, working. Maybe they'd find something on one planet, something that could helped his universe. Even with the destruction of Thor's Hammer, he had a chance to find something to help Sha're.
Daniel took a breath. He stood up. He could make himself useful until the next mission. He had a few things he wanted to study first. The mummy they brought back lay on the table. He was dying to start on it. Or there were the Goa'uld devices.
Daniel didn't make any motion to begin on any of them. He sat down and looked at the tables.
What the hell was he even doing here? Once the excitement and rush wore off, Daniel realized how inappropriate this was. Talk about a lack of priorities. The fact that he was still thrilled about the prospect of spending a day studying them angered him at the same time as it excited him. Sha're was out there, still a host. Or maybe not, if his universe really had been destroyed. Daniel had a hard time wrapping his head around the concept. Part of him still didn't believe it was true. He wanted proof. Something besides Stacy and the Daligig's word. At the same time, having actual proof only meant that what felt like a terrible possibility became cold, hard fact. Maybe he didn't want to know. It was easier on his sanity if he could wonder if SG-1 was out there still.
And here he was, about to get arm deep in relics and a dead civilization. Like it had any bearing on what was supposed to be the most important thing. He should be trying to get back home or - or do something to help everything and everyone he ever cared about.
Sure thing, as soon as he found some good options. So far, Daniel didn't see anything better than staying on this ship. Even if he found a Stargate, it wasn't like he could abandon ship. It wasn't a matter of attachment but practicality. Where would he go? No point of origin, or maybe they were different, and even if he went back to this Earth, nothing was quite the same. It wasn't his universe. He was better off sticking with Stacy, Daniel had to admit to himself. Everything seemed to converge on her. If anything was going to come up that would help, it would more likely happen around her. That left him doing missions while he was on board, working. Maybe they'd find something on one planet, something that could helped his universe. Even with the destruction of Thor's Hammer, he had a chance to find something to help Sha're.
Daniel took a breath. He stood up. He could make himself useful until the next mission. He had a few things he wanted to study first. The mummy they brought back lay on the table. He was dying to start on it. Or there were the Goa'uld devices.
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It seemed an obvious assumption to make in her opinion, "I mean as far as I can tell resources on board are fairly limited, have you seen the food?! And when they have a perfectly good stasis system in place, surely it makes sense that they'd be a little more selective otherwise they'd risk mutiny. Not that I want to go back in the pods, obviously out here is far more preferable."
The whole deal with Stacy and this war was a lot to take in, but Vala had already done some homework, not to mention keeping abreast of transmissions on the omnicomm. It all just seemed so unlikely, and coming from someone with her experience, that was saying something. If she was to express her thoughts and doubts to anyone though, it was Daniel. He might not know her but she definitely knew him and she trusted him implicitly.
"You think somebody attacked you?" Her attention brought back to his injury, and if she knew about the ribs... "Well did they came at you from behind? Was it somebody you knew?"
"Oh and I'm a member of SG-1?" she threw in as an afterthought in answer to his question with an unsure smile, a smile that turned into a cautious lipbite as she tried to gauge his reaction. She wasn't sure if he'd believe her given that he didn't know her, but she'd been honest and she figured that was the best route to take, the route he would have told her to take as well.
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"Anyway, I think it's an option. I mean, they couldn't force you to fight, right? " Daniel now sounded unsure. Eva had said as much when it came to the assignment process skipping over her for missions, that she'd had an obligation to her kid. Then again, she was, or had been, a gunner or something for Stacy, so she did serve in some capacity. What about the children on board? The Daligig couldn't possibly force them to serve, could they? Daniel had to admit, Vala was right. And practical in a way that surprised him. The question about supplies had occurred to him too. Kang said that they supposedly restocked on shore leave, but he'd only seen one so far. And it hadn't seemed like nearly enough to serve the entire ship for who knew how long until the next shore leave. "You're right though, the limits on supplies could be a problem if someone isn't willing pull their weight. You should ask the Captain to be sure."
Daniel picked up the pencil, looked over at the mummy, at the carpals, and jotted something down. Maybe he could try to get some work done, now that Vala was distracted from the sarcophagus. "Yes, I think someone attacked me. If I knew who it was, I'd go to Security and let them handle it. All I remember was working on the sarcophagus, and then the next moment, I was coming to on the ground. With all this." He waved a hand, a little embarrassed, at the head wound.
He managed a few more notes then completely forgot about them. Vala? Part of SG-1? Daniel's head cocked as he regarded her curiously. It might've also come off as a little of 'really? you?'. She did know about the Goa'uld, their devices and the Jaffa, and SG-1's existence, like the SGC, was classified. Granted, all their enemies knew of their existence too. So far, Vala hadn't tried to do anything to him. But Vala on SG-1 or any SG team, it certainly hadn't happened where he was from. Still, he was willing to hear her out first. See what she had to say at least.
"So you signed on somehow and that's where we met?"
It did add a little more to the theory he had in mind. But from where he'd come from, there wasn't much of an opening in SG-1. More like no opening at all. And somehow, he couldn't see Jack working well with Vala.
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Besides, the fact that someone had attacked him, presumably someone from the ship, was more pressing in Vala's opinion. "Well are there any likely subjects? I mean, who came on the dig with you? Was the planet uninhabited?"
The head wound might only be minor, but Vala is concerned okay, deal with it Daniel. She could fix it with the healing device, she considered, picking it back up off the table and toying with it absently while he scribbled in his notebook. But that would open a whole new can of worms having to explain that she was an ex-host, she kind of hoped he'd forgotten about her claims earlier about being able to operate it. At least for now.
"Well not exactly, no." Vala wondered about how much she should tell him, and then in typical Vala style she suddenly realised that this was an ideal opportunity to completely erase her 'colourful' past as Woolsey had put it. A chance to start over with him. It was perfect, why she hadn't thought of it earlier, she had no idea! She wouldn't outright lie about anything, but there was no harm in strategic omissions, right?
"You see, it's a long story. You were on board the Prometheus, the Earth spaceship I told you about and were travelling through the same section of space that I was. I'd sent out a distress call, as my ship had been badly damaged by Goa'uld al'kesh and I was stranded. The Prometheus answered my distress call and I ringed aboard and the rest is history."
Yes, that'd do for now. Simple. Vala smiled brightly with an innocent shrug.
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Oh wait, he didn't and he hadn't even been looking for trouble.
Most people glanced at the stitches and moved on. Vala on the other hand, couldn't let it go. Why did she care so much? He'd done nothing but give her trouble within a short amount of time. Daniel thought it over. He'd been through this already, run down a list of everyone, but it couldn't hurt. The Doctor? No, he couldn't, but then again, he had destroyed a planet. River? A mystery wrapped up in a bundle. Come to think of it, he didn't know anything about her. John, Cassie? Cassie didn't seem like she'd hurt a fly and John might be something of an ass, but Daniel couldn't see it in him. There was a big difference between "being in a pain in the ass" and "attacking someone". He silently continued down the list. None of which brought him closer. Daniel hunched his shoulders. He hadn't thought it over nearly that much before until this, but he really was alone on the ship. He'd had Teal'c, Sam, and Jack to watch his back. People he knew and trusted. Jack especially.
Daniel was back on his own. Look what a great job he did.
"Aside from a few animals, yes," To be perfectly honest, the idea that someone singled him out sank into his gut just as much as the fact he'd been attacked in the first place. Aside from the Goa'uld wanting him dead for being part of the giant thorn in their side, Daniel didn't see why anyone would bother with him. "I assume it was someone from the ship. But I don't actually know anyone here that well. It could've been anyone," As much as he hated to assume the potential of everyone, he wasn't in a position to say otherwise. Daniel couldn't bring himself to say it. I guess I wish I knew why I was attacked. Maybe Vala would just drop it if he kept it clinical. Anyway his insecurities weren't her business. They just met.
The pen continued to move across page. Daniel's eyes floated back over to Vala - why did he keep looking for her? - just in time to see her put down the healing device device. Yeah. That was why. From the sarcophagus to the healing device. He fidgeted. What was next on the list of things Vala Had to Touch, the ribbon device? Didn't she say earlier she could use it? If she could, please, please leave it alone. She claimed they knew each other, but Daniel had enough of knowing he didn't trust anyone and having it come back to bite him in the ass anyway. She couldn't be serious about it. The only way anyone could use it was if they were a host, like Kendra.
"Well no." The rest wasn't history. Especially not for him. And she ringed aboard how, if she wasn't in a Goa'uld ship, Daniel found himself wondering. "How did you come to join SG-1? It's not exactly easy to become part of the SGC." He probably didn't want to know this, but he couldn't leave well enough alone. "You said we knew each other very " intimately "well. How?"
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"Then I was a probationary member for a while. But I more than proved myself on several missions before being made a proper member. Badges and all." The pride in her achievement showed through in her smile. Underneath the sassy sarcastic exterior, Daniel was privy to a brief glimpse of a much softer and more vulnerable woman.
It was a smile that was quickly wiped off her face when she spotted the ribbon device though, she'd been about to pick the object up, obscured at is was where it lay on the table and it wasn't obvious what it was at first glance. She had absolutely no inclination to pick that up though. It was hard to even look at without being reminded of what she had done with it. Vala was caught like a rabbit in headlights momentarily just staring at it, a distant faraway look in her eye as she recalled... Nope, she refused to even consider it, with a sudden whirl around and heading back towards the table with the mummy, she offered Daniel an awkward smile. It wasn't supposed to be awkward, she'd been aiming for nonchalant, but didn't quite pull it off.
"So," she continued, brushing off any hint of the last few moments. "Do you have a list of attendees on the dig? Perhaps I could make some subtle inquiries."
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He was just surprised to hear they let her come offworld with the team if she hadn't passed the psych eval first. That couldn't be right. "They really let you go on several missions before becoming a team member?" so he was just a little skeptical.
Daniel gave up working on notes. Non-scientists moving about made it hard to concentrate, especially when he had to worry about things getting knocked over or someone cutting themselves on something. And he'd been watching Vala anyway. Work wasn't going to get done unless she planted her butt on a table somewhere and didn't move. There was no way to miss the way the smile vanished the moment she caught sight of the kara kesh. She stared at it, clearly taken by surprise, and then seemed to drift off.
Oh yeah, he knew that too.
Looked like she'd had the "privilege" of getting up close and personal with a ribbon device too. Only someone who'd been tortured with one of those could really understand what that thing really was. Eva barely glanced at it. It looked pretty to anyone else. Innocent. An exceptionally graceful and well made piece of jewelry. He and Vala were the only people who got what it actually was.
Daniel met her awkward smile with a solemn little nod. He knew. He understood.
"I do." Now that she was back at the table, he could try to get more work done. Daniel reached for the pencil, then looked up at her. It hadn't escaped his notice that she'd avoided his question. As far as he was concerned, they'd never met. He hadn't wanted to stop the dig or pull hands off to waste time on an investigation at the time. He wasn't worth more than the dig or what they could learn. "Vala, why would you do that for me?"
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"It's all very convoluted Daniel, and forgive me for being blunt but there are so many gaping holes in your experiences that..." Vala wasn't even sure how to progress, or if she even should. She couldn't explain how any of this was even possible.
"Daniel, by my reckoning you're years younger. That's a lot of water over the bridges."
As far as she was concerned that answered all his questions, even the 'why?'. Vala didn't know how to verbalise the answer to that last question anyway, well beyond that she cared about him. But cared didn't really cover the anger that simmered beneath the surface at the thought of this person still being at large, and possibly attempting a repeat performance.
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Daniel guessed that was Vala-speak for 'Shut up, Daniel. Stop asking so many questions'. Afraid Jack had you beat there, he got it down to one word. There was something to be said about military efficiency. A measured "Daniel", which translated to any number of things, ranging from Daniel, hurry up, to Daniel, whatcha doin'? to a very angry Daniel, shut up. If there was one thing he had a hard time with, it was knowing when to shut up. He still thought it was a valid question. What was the point of the psych eval then if they let you go off world without it, even as a probationary member? It sort of defeated the purpose. And it was a hole in her story. Giving her version of 'it's a long story' only made him want to dig more.
Years younger. Really? Although she was touching on the theory he'd been working on the side while he'd been busy working and watching Vala. Still hadn't answered his question though. The more she shied away, the more Daniel wanted to latch on.
"Maybe I am. So why would you?" Daniel persisted. If this person had no problems attacking someone from behind, then obviously they had no qualms about violence. Vala was only putting herself out there, and as far as today had gone, for a pain in the ass archaeologist who thought it was great to accuse of her theft. She didn't even owe him the time of the day, much less sticking her neck out.
Tapping the pencil against the table, Daniel considered the past conversations with Vala and with Doctor Song and John. Everything seemed to fit as a possibility.
Daniel piped up after a second. "I have a theory about that, actually. It's 1997 where I come from. What year is it for you?"
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Vala had a hard time admitting to any emotional attachments, even to herself. They never did you any good, they just made things more complicated. She'd finally allowed herself to form real relationships, and genuinely care about other people and now look where it had landed her? If it hadn't been for Daniel being here, she'd already be planning her escape. Running. Like she always had. It didn't matter what was out there. But it was his words that tugged at her conscience. Words he hadn't even spoken yet.
'You've been running so long it's almost second nature to you. You don't remember it, but you made a decision to stop running. It's over. Now it's time to come home.'
That was the answer to your question, Daniel. Except when she did open her mouth to answer and faltered before she spoke, it didn't quite come out like that. In fact, nothing like it. It was definitely more irritated and a little condescending too.
"Well...it's all your fault! Besides, I've nothing better to do, and you're obviously not capable of looking after yourself."
Vala turned her attention to the Mummy behind her on the table to distract herself and make it look like she didn't really care either way. Was that something in its skinny decayed hand? She leaned over her shoulder to take a closer but apparently disinterested look.
"1997?!" Abruptly she straightened up again, she'd expected a discrepancy, but actual confirmation of it was a shock. And that's when she felt something and heard something audibly snap underneath her hand behind her on the table as she shifted position. She cringed, not daring to look.
"2006 for me." Oops.
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Vala seemed to have a hard time answering his question, which was weird because she sure didn't have any trouble dropping hints back at the greeting room. Was it really that hard to just say it? Apparently it was. Daniel started to look back down when Vala replied. His shoulders twitched reflexively. That stung. A lot. She didn't even have to say it in nearly the same patronizing, "let's-haze-the-geek' way the Marines used to do his first few weeks. Vala was just so matter-of-fact about it that it hurt even more.
She found herself with a nasty look aimed her way over his glasses. It wasn't even that she was wrong. That was the problem. She was completely right. Daniel had just been thinking the same thing to herself. He bit his lip. Maybe there was a reliance building on SG-1. Like a crutch, Daniel thought. He'd handled himself before Abydos just fine. Plenty of digs, plenty of foreign countries, plenty of watching his own back. But this time he hadn't and he'd paid the price. It was easy to act like SG-1 was at fault, but who was he kidding? He'd gotten so wrapped up in what he was doing that he'd tuned everything else out. Daniel flushed. Jack was right. Vala was right.
"What makes you think you'd do better? I know you about as well as anyone else on the dig," Daniel pointed out heatedly. "Who's to say you won't do the same-"
Several things happened at once. Vala told him the year and there was a crack of something dry and brittle. Daniel froze. The room itself seemed to go deadly still. Daniel desperately hoped that sound wasn't what he thought it was. She was from so far in his future. I'm still at Stargate Command? What did that say about Sha're? The main reason he was there because of her. Daniel peered around Vala's thighs with something that could only be dread. The mummy's wrist had snapped off, with just a few dried ligaments holding it on. This was the only mummy of its kind in this entire universe. The archaeologist swallowed. He tried very hard to control the rising anger. He counted to ten in Goa'uld.
Daniel's voice, he was proud to say, shook only a little. "I think you need to leave."
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She hadn't meant to hurt him with her comment, Vala had only been concerned with deflecting her own truth. Saying they had been intimate earlier was different, it was a deliberate ploy to make him flounder when she was annoyed at him. Now when she was actually being asked to admit something personal, something true, she just couldn't manage it. Not when he was asking so directly.
Vala's thought processes weren't that clear in her own head though, she'd simply stated a fact. Ergo, she didn't understand his petulance, it just served to escalate hers.
"Because I've spent a lifetime watching my own back!" She retorted angrily. "Adding someone else's to the list is hardly a challenge. And what possible motive would I have for harming you?"
That was when the shit had hit the proverbial fan though. Vala glanced back at the damage cautiously and then back to him in much the same cautious vein.
"Perhaps if you count to 20 instead, you'll be ready to consider make-up sex as an alternative option?"
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Makeup sex. Daniel flushed even more, and this time it wasn't all due to embarrassment. He knew she was joking, that she was trying to defuse her own accident, maybe get him to laugh, but you didn't joke about that. Not to him. He was married to Sha're. Still was! As it was, that comment was the last straw.
Daniel jerked to his feet. She needed to leave, right now. He couldn't work under these conditions. And counting to ten in every language he knew could only keep his patience so long. For a second, Daniel had to hold onto the back of a chair, reflexively grasping his side. He took a cautious breath, and the sudden flinch of pain went back down to a dull ache. Then he pulled Vala off the table and shifting his grip down to her elbow, began to firmly pull her towards the exit.
"No, you definitely need to leave. I can't work like this," Daniel clenched his teeth. "And for the record, 'What motive would you have?' Hm, maybe I should ask what possible motive did that other person have?"
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Well this was a familiar feeling, being ushered out by Daniel forcefully. If she had a dollar for every time this had happened. Vala didn't make it easy for him though, mostly she let herself be pulled, but she did put up a little resistance. Well as much as she could without making him injure himself more.
Yes, she'd caught the way he'd held his side. "Fine, fine. I'll go. Just don't... just don't hurt yourself," she protested as they neared the door. Shirking her arm from his irritatedly, she took the last couple of steps unaided.
Hovering at the door with her back to him, she paused. "You know, I could heal that for you?"
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Vala didn't make it easy on him, but Daniel kept up the pressure and hold, and escorted her through the mass of tables. As soon as they got to the door, Daniel released her. He planted his arm on the door frame, forming a blockade, just in case she got any ideas to edge past him.
"I'll pass, thanks," Daniel grumbled. You've done more than enough for today, Vala. If she was talking about the healing device, Daniel didn't want her near any more artifacts. His sanity could only take so much and healing ribs Even if it brought up some serious questions about how she could do it. He thought only previous hosts could. And now he lost the opportunity to check that theory, her back was away from him. She had him so flustered he couldn't think straight.
Still, she offered to help. She was trying. Daniel closed his eyes and tried to reign in his temper. "Look. I just need some time alone, okay?"
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"Right. Time alone. I can see that," she conceded reluctantly with a shrug and a head tilt. Vala narrowed her eyes to look up and down the corridor outside the lab, she had no idea where she was actually going to go, but it wouldn't hurt to do some more scouting around, she supposed.
"Oh!" Vala suddenly added brightly. "One more question. How much time... roughly?"
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"I don't know. Until I get further on the workload. Or when I need sleep," Chances were he was going to fall asleep here before he even got to his quarters, but maybe he'd realize he was tired in time. Or finish early. Now he was just indulging in a lot of wishful thinking. The reality was that he probably wouldn't make it to his quarters, he wouldn't realize he was tired in time, and he'd probably forget to eat.
It felt like he was leaving her out in the cold for reason. Daniel stared at her back, wondering what she wanted from him. Maybe she knew him. Maybe she wasn't being entirely truthful. But she was a stranger to him. She seemed to expect something and Daniel didn't think he could give it to her, no more than he could give the same to anyone else who had just popped onto Stacy. Whatever it even was.
Even if she was a stranger, he'd put something inanimate, dead before a living person. And here everyone thought he was the people person. That gnawing sensation in his stomach felt suspiciously like a little guilt. Daniel chewed at his lip. "Did you get assigned quarters yet? Because you should check with the Captain if you haven't. Get somewhere to stay."
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She didn't really consider not coming back. He was Daniel and she was Vala, and that was enough to cement their connection in her mind. It was that simple. He'd just have to get used to her being around.
Vala had already started up the corridor as he called out to her about quarters. And then there it was, that unmistakable concern for others, regardless of his annoyance. Yep, Daniel was still Daniel, regardless of the year. She smiled to herself.
"I was thinking I'd just bunk down with you for now!" She called back over her shoulder chirpily. And then she bounce-turned a corner and disappeared out of sight.