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trans_92011-05-22 10:26 pm
i-saw-myself.livejournal.com) wrote in trans_92011-05-22 10:26 pm
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a dragon lives forever but not so little boys [open]
"Toothless! Oh, Toooothless! You hungry, bud?"
Hiccup still preferred to feed the dragon, even if Toothless could will up food anytime if he wanted. It was their way of spending time together. Hiccup would feed him, Toothless would happily regurgitate some, Hiccup would politely decline and maybe fry up his own, un-eaten fish, and they'd just spend an hour or two in each other's company.
Toothless wasn't there in his Sensorium, though, but that didn't worry Hiccup at first. The dragon was free to wander where he wanted, and he could've been anywhere.
So he took to the halls.
"Toothless! Where are you, buddy? It's dinnertime! Toooothless!"
Not in his forge. Not in Daja's Forge. Not in the Drunken Dragon. Not near the river, not on Obs, not in the halls, not in any of the other Sensoriums, not there, not there, not there, not there.
Hiccup was in something of a panic towards the end.
"Toothless! Buddy! C'mon, where are you? Toothless! This isn't funny! No hide and seek, okay? Where are you?"
He knew. In his heart of hearts, he knew.
It was in the Spacewalk that he finally stopped, late, very late, when most were sleeping, when Astrid would've been expecting him come to bed, and there, heartbroken, he asked Stacy the question he knew was going to get an answer that he didn't want to hear.
"Stacy, where's Toothless? Where is he?!"
||There is no one named Toothless on the active crew roster.||
Repodded.
Hiccup knew he was safe, he knew he was even safer than if he was outside, he knew he'd see him again, but all the things he knew didn't matter when juxtaposed with one, simple fact. His best friend was gone. His best friend, who'd been by his side near-constantly since they'd taken their first flight together, was gone. His best friend who'd comforted him through the end of his world, through horror and being bed-bound with injuries, who'd kept him sane even when trapped in another form in Fairplay, who loved him all the times he couldn't love himself--he was gone.
Gone gone gone.
If anyone were to come by the Spacewalk, they'd find a teenage boy sitting on the floor, staring out of the clear panels of the tunnel there, at the stars and twisting dimensions going by.
"I'll find you, bud. She can't hide you away forever, and if she tries, I'll find you. I swear."
His knobbly knees were drawn up, with his arms around them, and he was very pointedly, very purposefully, not crying. He wasn't crying at all.
[ooc: Can be a standalone, as he's emo-ing pretty badly, but if anyone's nice to him during it, he'll probably seek them out and try to be friends later.]
Hiccup still preferred to feed the dragon, even if Toothless could will up food anytime if he wanted. It was their way of spending time together. Hiccup would feed him, Toothless would happily regurgitate some, Hiccup would politely decline and maybe fry up his own, un-eaten fish, and they'd just spend an hour or two in each other's company.
Toothless wasn't there in his Sensorium, though, but that didn't worry Hiccup at first. The dragon was free to wander where he wanted, and he could've been anywhere.
So he took to the halls.
"Toothless! Where are you, buddy? It's dinnertime! Toooothless!"
Not in his forge. Not in Daja's Forge. Not in the Drunken Dragon. Not near the river, not on Obs, not in the halls, not in any of the other Sensoriums, not there, not there, not there, not there.
Hiccup was in something of a panic towards the end.
"Toothless! Buddy! C'mon, where are you? Toothless! This isn't funny! No hide and seek, okay? Where are you?"
He knew. In his heart of hearts, he knew.
It was in the Spacewalk that he finally stopped, late, very late, when most were sleeping, when Astrid would've been expecting him come to bed, and there, heartbroken, he asked Stacy the question he knew was going to get an answer that he didn't want to hear.
"Stacy, where's Toothless? Where is he?!"
||There is no one named Toothless on the active crew roster.||
Repodded.
Hiccup knew he was safe, he knew he was even safer than if he was outside, he knew he'd see him again, but all the things he knew didn't matter when juxtaposed with one, simple fact. His best friend was gone. His best friend, who'd been by his side near-constantly since they'd taken their first flight together, was gone. His best friend who'd comforted him through the end of his world, through horror and being bed-bound with injuries, who'd kept him sane even when trapped in another form in Fairplay, who loved him all the times he couldn't love himself--he was gone.
Gone gone gone.
If anyone were to come by the Spacewalk, they'd find a teenage boy sitting on the floor, staring out of the clear panels of the tunnel there, at the stars and twisting dimensions going by.
"I'll find you, bud. She can't hide you away forever, and if she tries, I'll find you. I swear."
His knobbly knees were drawn up, with his arms around them, and he was very pointedly, very purposefully, not crying. He wasn't crying at all.
[ooc: Can be a standalone, as he's emo-ing pretty badly, but if anyone's nice to him during it, he'll probably seek them out and try to be friends later.]
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He admits it too fast, and buries his face in his knees again.
"Not here. At home. She wasn't repodded or taken, she just . . . went away."
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"Mine died. I know that's different, especially since it happened when I was really little, but I know how hard it is, to have it so someone who's supposed to be there...just isn't."
Hiccup leaned against him, a way of offering comfort without doing something like hugging.
"I'm sorry."
And he meant it. How much he meant it was in the cadence of his voice, creased into his face. It wasn't pity, either, him thinking 'Oh you poor boy.' He was just sorry. He just wished Zuko hadn't had to grow up without his mom, simple as that.
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Sometimes . . . bad things just happened. Zuko was at the stage where he was just starting to learn that.
He heaves a sigh and leans back into Hiccup.
"Stacy's stupid. Taking away your friend - bringing my sister instead -"
A grown up, scarier version of his sister. Had she burned him? Is he remembering that right?
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He heaved a long sigh.
"Especially with your sister. You need to stay away from here until they find the cure. Well, you need to stay away from her in general, but right now, especially."
Actually...
"In fact, you should probably stick with me for a while, until they fix you. You're going to keep getting younger. You'll get more confused the younger you get."
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Lies. He's ten.
"I can still do more hotsquats than you."
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"I know she's better than me, okay? Shut up."
Hearing his own outburst, the kid buries his face in his hands and groans.
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It almost sounded like there was a "to" at the end of that sentence, but it drifted off into mumbling.
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With great ability to torch crap comes great responsibility to torch the right crap, Zuko.
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Zuko is too young to deflect this conversation back to Hiccup's issues at this point, but not quite young enough to realize they're approaching the matter of matter from entirely different perspectives. "She's better than me at everything, and everyone thinks she's great. Nobody cares what I do." His arms are crossed tightly, and he stares at the ground, his voice dropping to a mumble. "Not since Mom left."
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It was a great, big chasm of a question, something he felt almost wrong asking, because of the weight to it, because Zuko was young and might say things he might not when he was older, but he wanted to know. He wanted to understand, and if things were what he thought they were, he wanted to magically happen on the right words for Zuko to understand.
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"He thinks I'm not as good as Azula."
That's about all he can say on that relationship, just then.
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He let the words hang there, knowing the weight of saying something like that to someone who thought he had to go above and beyond to prove himself to his father.
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"Have you even seen her firebending?"
Her flames are blue. Her flames. Are BLUE.
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Hiccup gestured with his hands in a way that said 'Nix the fire magic talk.'
"It's about the fact you're a better person. You're a better warrior because of what you fight for. And by all accounts, you wind up a better Firelord than she could ever be, because you care about your people, and you care about the weak, and you care about making the right choices."
Hiccup stood up and put his hands on Zuko's shoulders, and looked down at him.
"You become the kind of person you can be proud of. Winning yourself over is much harder than winning anyone else over, trust me on that."
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"It's ALL about the firebending! Dad doesn't care about weak people!"
Duh!
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Because Ozai was already a proud, feared Prince to begin with.
Because he's Zuko's father, and because Zuko's not good enough to be a son Ozai can be proud of.
"You just don't get it. Your dad's not the Fire Lord. You don't have to show him you're good enough to be Fire Lord after he's gone."
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The stern look left his features.
"I know what it's like to feel like you're not good enough. I also knew what it was like to have a father that looked at me like I was so weak he nearly couldn't believe I was his."
Stern look was back.
"Don't tell me I don't know what it's like to feel weak, and useless, and not good enough. 'Useless' used to be my nickname in the village."
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"Yeah, but that's a village," he says, in his explaining-things-to-someone-less-royal-than-me voice. "One day, I have to rule a nation." He says it, then pauses, as if that's actually sinking in. He has to rule a nation. A whole nation. "With Azula being better than me at everything."
And in the knowledge of this, Zuko crosses his arms and glares at the floor again.
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"Your dad is wrong about you. I can say that because I have an edge your dad doesn't have--I've seen the Firelord you grow up into, and he's not weak."