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For Iniss, the past few weeks had passed in a haze. Like living in the pool, traveling between worlds. He existed, and that was all.

It was better than the alternative, as vulnerable as he was in this state, he was lucky he wasn't dead. But his enclosure has been fully explored, he wasn't in the pool. He was in something small and vaguely round.

His experience on earth suggested a fish tank, or at least something small and glass.

He was fairly certain it was glass, and also that whatever had him had figured out that he needed to be fed.

Oh crap.

Something was in the water. Something that wasn't an ear. Something, he assumed, that was large and strong and more than capable of crushing him in this state.

Oh crap.

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That 'something' was in fact Merlin's hand - which was currently holding a small, plastic castle that he'd found while lost in the City.

"There, now you have a castle and I don't - so no complaining," Merlin told the Yeerk, even though he had no idea whether Iniss could hear him.

If Merlin was watching the slug he was currently ~~torturing~~ enriching, Iniss was making a valiant effort to hide. Rather difficult, from an outside perspective, as the bowl was round and small with very few objects in it and impossible to escape from completely.

He really hated humans and their innovations sometimes.

When I get out of here, whoever you are, you are going to pay and pay dearly. Just wait until I get a pair of those hands you seem so proud of!

He waited until the commotion in the liquid had faded completely before moving to explore the new invader.

After pulling his hand back out of the tank Merlin watched the slug moving around for a moment. He wrinkled his nose a little - every time he looked at it, it was impossible not to feel disgust. At the idea of this creature inside someone's head, controlling them.

But at least Tom wouldn't have to deal with that anymore. And if Merlin kept Iniss hidden, no one would ever have to know that he'd used magic to remove him.

Bringing out the box that he used to keep the fishbowl covered and out of sight, Merlin propped it back over the bowl, hiding it from view.

Tom had dragged his feet over this. Even making up his mind that he would, he still couldn't help dragging his feet. He'd spent hours at one of the view ports, dry-eyed and watching the void stretch on outside the window. It didn't help, even the reminder, even the moment to embrace the sight of the stars stretched outside the window didn't help.

It felt a little bit like dying, he supposed. A little bit like giving up.

And a lot like he'd give anything to not have to do this. But he had to.

He had to do this. He had to. His lower lip was bloody from chewing on it, eyes dark and solemn.

There were no tears. He'd stopped crying at the pool a few months in, crying now seemed pointless. It'd just make his head hurt. He raised his hand, quietly knocking at the door and waiting for it to open.

The knock startled Merlin - unlike back home, he didn't have people coming telling him all the time that he needed to go serve Arthur, or help Gaius, or whatever. But he went to open the door, and when he did he blinked in surprise at the person standing there.

"Tom?" Why was Tom here? And why did he look so...shocked? (Had he found out? Had he realised that Merlin has used magic, and come here to confront him?!) "Are you alright?" he said slowly.

He tried to smile, but it felt odd on his face and he let it fade after a moments effort. "Hi."

How was he supposed to start this? 'Hi, I know you have my Yeerk, I've come for him back, please and thanks'?

"I'm fine. I-Merlin, you need to put him back. People are getting worried that somethings been done to him and that's not good for the ship." People. The Ship.

It was always about everyone else, wasn't it? Always about what they needed. It had been that way for too long for him to stop now.

Merlin stepped back, gaping. For a moment he thought about denying it, pretending that he'd had nothing to do with Iniss's disappearance. But Tom had already been able to figure out that Merlin had Iniss. And there were others on the ship, people who used magic freely and weren't hated for it. Maybe...

"Why would you want him back?" he said finally, confused. "He was controlling you! If people are worried about him," (and who on earth was more worried about the slug than Tom?), "Then just give him to them. You don't have to keep him on your own head, that's just wrong."

"Because I made a deal." Or Jake had, it was the same thing, in the end. "And he was keeping it."

He ducked his head, hands curled into lose fists at his side. "It wouldn't be right, to be less honest than him, would it? Poor sportsmanship or something."

He closed his eyes, just for a moment, wishing that was an option. Wishing he could just ditch the Yeerk and go back to movie nights with Kaylee and Dean and Sam and trying to keep Bobby from kicking anything vital when he jumped off the couch.

But he had to keep this deal.

Merlin frowned. "What deal?"

What could Tom have been willing to exchange his own freedom for?

"Does it matter?" He twitched his lips, more grimace than smile. "I made a deal with him, to keep him in my head. Until such a time as an artificial host could be made. He was keeping it, I'm currently not."

He looked down again. "Please, Merlin, this is hard enough."

"Of course it matters," Merlin said, staring. "You're giving your own body away! What could he possibly be giving you that you're willing to give up that for?"

"You're wrong." He looked away, quiet, eyes half closed. "It's not for him. I promised someone I would, someone who's helped me more than anyone in this universe ever has. I need to keep my promise to her. It won't last forever. Just a little while longer."

He sighed, looking up at Merlin. "The simple answer is, I promised. I gave my word. Do you want to make me less honest than an alien brain slug?"

Merlin was silent for a moment. Promises were important - he knew that. If they weren't, if he hadn't sworn on his own mother's life, he'd have never released the dragon.

And admittedly, Merlin couldn't help but admire it a little. Arthur was like Tom - always determined to keep his word, and his honour. Even when it was completely stupid to do so.

"How long?" he asked quietly.

"A couple more months. It's not terrible. I get time to spend with my brother. That's more than I've had in years. It won't last for long at all. The Council is working on it."

There was no honor here, nothing to be honored but one broken boy clinging desperately to the one promise he had a chance to keep in almost half a decade.

"Thank you. By the way." He smiled, a fleeting, heartfelt thing. "For showing me what it's going to be like when it's really mine.

Merlin looked at Iniss for a moment. It might not be honour, but to Merlin it looked like it. And even if he respected honour...well. He hadn't been above doing things that Arthur didn't approve of in order to protect him, in the past. Why not the same with Tom?

"If I give him back to you, and they Council doesn't do - what exactly are they trying to do? Whatever it is, if they don't do it, then I'm not letting him stay in your head forever. I'll take him right back out again. And he's got to understand that it's your body, alright? He's just a visitor. He doesn't own it, and if he wants to use it he ask to ask you for permission first. Okay?"

"They're making host bodies, basically just shells and no one home upstairs. So he can have his own." He grimaced again, inclining his head in mute agreement.

Iniss wouldn't, he knew that well enough, but he had a feeling that Merlin wouldn't let him take the Yeerk if he didn't agree. "Please don't do the magic thing again, I almost threw up. But yeah, there's a time limit. It'll end."

"They can do that?" Merlin asked, staring. "Sorry, I won't. Well, not unless he doesn't come out on his own. He can come out on his own, right? He's not just...stuck swimming around in there with no way of getting in or out?"

"If you want to watch how they get in and out, I'll show you. But it's sort of gross. Yeah, they can enter and leave."

He shrugged, smiling faintly. "Magic. Or science. Or some combo of the two, I don't know, it just works. They'll do it. I know they will. "

"You know I'm not sure that's something I'd really want to watch," Merlin said, his mind already conjuring up all sorts of horrible ways in which a slug could go into someone's head.

With a quick glance back at Tom, Merlin walked back to the box that covered the fishbowl. He took off the box, and gently picked up the bowl before bringing it back over to Tom. "Do you need the whole thing or just...him?" he said, wrinkling his nose at the slug swimming around.

"Trust me, I don't like watching it either. It's pretty gross. I don't blame you."

He watched Merlin, eyes solem and quiet, knowing what he was doing. "If you don't mind, I'll take the whole thing...just...so he doesn't dry out before I put him back in. I'll bring the tank back."

He stared at the Yeerk, stomach lurching in disgust.

Merlin nodded, handing the tank over. "You know if you ever change your mind, you just need to say so," he said. "This girl you made a deal with - I'm sure she wouldn't want you to get hurt. If she cares about you, I don't think she'll mind if you decide that you can't do this anymore."

He figured this girl must be important to Tom, if he would go this far for her. But if she cared about Tom, she couldn't begrudge him changing his mind, right?

Edited 2011-02-10 00:29 (UTC)

He didn't. Everyone kept telling him that, everyone kept telling him it was his choice. It wasn't.

"Yeah. Thanks, Merlin. I mean it."

She was important. The first person who had given him a chance to reclaim anything. It felt like a test, like even if she wasn't there, he had to keep this deal with her.

Because without her, this wouldn't be a chance at all.

"I'll see you later, okay?" Merlin said. And Merlin meant that - he might have let Tom take back Iniss, but he wasn't going to just leave him to fend for himself.

Iniss had been taking control of Tom without his permission before. Merlin had seen it. He'd make sure that didn't happen again.

"See you, Merlin."

He smiled, just a tiny twitch of his lip and turned down the hall, heading away with the tank in his arms.

Nearly twenty minutes later found him curled against the view-port, back to the stars. He just needed to finish a few things. Write a few little notes.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before reaching for the tank. "Looks like it's back to you and me, Iniss." His face twisted, something dark and anxious lingered behind his eyes before he lifted the Yeerk to his ear, fingers tightened on the edge of crushing it into paste.

Iniss rushed, barely pausing a moment to numb the ear he found himself faced with. Tom's brain was something of a relief, familiar. He knew this person, had spent years training him.

< Oh you've been busy. Where do I start? >

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