Tavros: Fail to console blockmate. [closed]

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Alex was carted off to the med bay, and Tavros just let everyone else go on ahead. Not much he could do, after all. He'd once again proven to be incredibly useless during the struggle, succeeding only in getting himself punched before finally having the good sense to get out of the way and call in someone more qualified to handle Alex's strange emotional battle. He felt awful letting Katara take the brunt of the attack, but what else was there to do? He'd been called a lot of things in the six solar sweeps he'd been alive, but brave was never one of them.

After a short debate with himself, he changed course and went back to the room he and Alex shared. Someone who could handle whatever was wrong with the guy would be on hand at the med bay, he was sure. He'd just be in the way again.

When Alex finally came back and wordlessly curled up on his bed, Tavros decided to put off the confrontation as long as possible. Complete silence reigned in their room for the first time since Tavros had moved in. He didn't know if Alex was better, or if he could even get better. He had no idea who Luna was, though that was probably none of his business.

He busied himself with mindless games on his husktop. The swollen bruise on his cheek was starting to itch, but he didn't want to draw attention to it.

Really, at this point, what could he possibly say that would help?

Comments

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Alex was breaking in and out of silent tears since he had gotten back, ashamed to even talk to Tavros. He was sick to even think of what he had done to his friends. And how disappointed Luna would be in him if she had known what he had done.

Alex was no longer 'checked out', but it seemed like the alternative might have been worse.

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Tap tap taptap... tap.

Oh look, another victorious level of some generic Tetris analogue.

Sure is quiet in here.

Tavros glances over his shoulder at Alex and wishes he'd said something sooner. Breaking the ice now would be more like trying to smash through a glacier.

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Alex managed to do it instead, taking advantage of the break in the tapping. "M-m-maybe y-you sh-should m-move s-someplace... s-safer..." He wasn't only stuttering, his voice was cracking and heavy with tears as he spoke.

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Tavros pauses the game and turns to face Alex. He's examining the floor, but at least he's turned in the right direction.

"Safer? Uh... safer, how? I don't see any, shadows on you."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Alex was silent again for some time, "I-I... I c-can't b-be trusted i-it seems..." Alex was now afraid that he might allow himself to slip and use his shadow powers while he was upset and have a shadow take him over again.

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Well, okay, that's kind of a point. Trolls aren't known for being openhearted, and even Tavros would be hesitant to say he trusts anyone. Especially now.

"Look, uhh. You seem like a, nice enough guy, in my opinion. You get mad, and, uh, things happen, and I'm sorry, but that's... true of anyone, I think."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Alex was still facing the wall, completely covered in the sheet. "B-but, I... I h-hurt you..."

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

"Uh... so? I mean, uhh, it was... scary, I guess, seeing the shadows, but, you should remember, I'm a troll. We kind of, usually, do worse than that to our friends."

A pause.

"Not that... I do. But, uh, I'm kind of bad at, um, being a troll."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

"B-but, w-we don'. I-I don'. I-I'm s-supposed ta p-protect t-them... I-I-I..." He moaned and began shaking with tears.

"I-I c-could've k-killed K-K-K-Katara!"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Tavros is quiet for a bit, partly because he's not sure what to do and partly to give Alex a chance to calm down again.

Eventually, he speaks up. "Well, uh, then... I guess you need to... work on your powers. So you can, um, control them. Instead of letting them, control you. If that makes any, uh, sense."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

"Nnng," Katara had suggested that too, and he knew how much harder it was than it sounded.

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, I probably, uh, didn't say that right. I'd help, if I could, but..."

But he was born with his powers, he likes them, and he's had about thirteen years to work with them. And really, their powers aren't on the same level at all.

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Granted, while Alex's powers are artificial, he could barely remember a time without them. But he was like any other teen- emotional.

"H-h-how c-could y-you w-want ta b-be m-my r-room-mate a-after all that..?"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

"Uh, because..." Tavros isn't used to dealing with people who have lower self esteem than he does. This is some strange new territory for the worst troll ever.

"Because, uh, we get along pretty well, I think. I like you, and Alice, and we have fun, um, playing games and stuff. And it's, probably a good idea, uh, to stick with the friends you have, even if, it's not always fun. Like, right now."

Dammit, the healing bruise itches. He has to stop himself again and again from reaching up to scratch.

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Even if he did Alex wouldn't see, not in his blanket cocoon, facing the other wall. "E-even if they m-might t-try an' k-kill y-you i-if they s-slip up?"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

But with his luck, Alex would roll over at exactly the wrong moment and see. So Tavros keeps his fidgety claws on the armrests and shrugs a little at Alex's words. "But, um. It doesn't seem like it, happens very often. And there are, uh, people, I know now, who can help. Or, maybe someday, I can do something, uh, more helpful, myself."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

"A-an' if I-if it happened w-with a s-s-stronger shadow? A-an' y-you c-couldn't s-stop m-m-me?"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

"Well, um, I guess... just in case, we both need to, get stronger."

Beat.

"Uh, for what it's worth, I'm sorry, for whatever happened, that got you so upset. Hopefully, uh, it won't, happen again."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Alex moaned and began sobbing out loud finally unable to hold himself back. "Wh-what i-if I c-can't?"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

"Uh, why couldn't you? I don't see, how it'd be impossible."

After a moment, he moves closer to the bed and gives Alex's shoulder an awkward pat. He's really bad at this.

"You can get stronger. I, uh, I'm sure you can."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Alex jumped from the touch worse than he ever had before, uttering a fearful moan. With another wimped he said, "p-please, d-don' h-hurt me. I-I'm s-s-sorry. I'm r-really s-sorry!"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Tavros drew back, even going as far as wheeling himself back from the bed. Of all the reactions he'd imagined, this one is basically the last.

He just has no words for a moment. When they finally do come, they're even more hesitant than his usual soft tone.

"Why, uh... why would I, hurt you?"

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

He bit at his hand under the sheet, trying to somehow calm himself. He was making Tavros feel bad too now, with his own fears of being punished for what he did. He deserved to be beaten for what he did. But he knew no one here would do that.

"I-I'm s-sorry... I-I... F-Father..." He feebaly pounded the back of his head with his fist, still hiding under the sheets. The sheets never really stopped anything, but at home they were the only place he could hide, and even then...

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Tavros is quiet, watching this and having no idea at all what he should do. Or if he should be doing anything.

"He's not here, you know. It's just, uh, me. And I'm not going to hurt you. I'm not, um, even mad at you. ...Okay?"

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Alex looked out from the sheets in a mixture of anger and total despair and confusion. "Wh-why not!? I-I c-could've k-killed y-you both, a-all 'c-'cause I'm t-to pathetic ta k-keep m-my powers i-in check!"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Oh hi, Alex. Good to see your puffy tear-streaked face again.

"You didn't, uh, get that close to killing either of us. Not me, anyway. Besides, it wasn't, um, really you, right? So, I'd be, blaming the wrong thing."

He shrugs. It'd take too long to explain that he's just never been spiteful. Bad troll, etc.

"So, no, I'm not... mad at you."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

"I-it was s-still a part o-of me! Th-that w-was my e-emotion!" He moved to better face Tavros, "W-what if Dhianeila i-isn't there n-next time? I-I d-don' k-know if I c-could stop it!"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Tavros shrinks back under the sudden onslaught. Who is this guy, and what has he done with Alex?

"Well... then... I guess, I'd better learn to, uh, defend myself better."

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

One of the most important things for Alex was to protect his friends, and he had just done the opposite of it. The only way he knew how to deal with that was to push them away. "An' i-if it's a t-tier 4 that t-takes m-me over? I-I don' e-even k-know h-how s-strong th-that might be!"

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

"You don't know how strong, it'd be? I'm not even sure I, uh, know what a tier four is. Just... that, I guess, I should try to, um, be prepared to fight one, someday."

Tavros is really unsure about all this, but he doesn't seem scared of Alex. Or angry.

[hack-rat.livejournal.com]

Alex moaned, upset that he couldn't seem to get the point across to Tavros that he was dangerous. He let the sheets around him fall. He wasn't wearing his sweatshirt. It was in a heap in the corner in case Alice returned and he wasn't there.

He didn't even seem to notice that he wasn't wearing it though as he moved to the door. He paused in front of it, using the back of his wrist to wipe away snot and tears, and said, "I'm r-really n-no g-good..." before walking out and letting the door close behind him.

[alterniantaurus.livejournal.com]

Tavros is equally confused about Alex's weird concerns about hurting him. Trolls are built for taking and dealing damage. Even him. Without exception, they're expected to fight. He'd rather not face a shadow, but if it happened, he planned to be ready. He didn't expect protection. Why Alex doesn't get this is something he decides to chalk up to cultural differences.

It's something of a relief when Alex goes. If he hadn't, Tavros would have, since the conversation was going nowhere. Taking some time out to cool off and think sounded good to him. After Alex leaves, he returns to the husktop. A little mindless gaming would be good right about now.