[OPEN]

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

I am Brainiac 8. I am your destruction.

Right now, Roy, when you're dying from suffocation, when the panic has begun to set in, this is the part when you remember... This is all your fault.

I killed Donna Troy to save the future. I suffered humiliation as that sweet, innocent robotic idiot.

No... You will not finish me. I have not crawled across centuries... Millennia... To be hobbled by a gaggle of half-ape mutations. You creatures of flesh! You will feel the fire inside those meat husks you call bodies!

Listening to those words, watching the destruction Brainiac 8 wrought, the pain she was bringing to her friends... Indigo almost can't make it through. She'd read enough on her omnicom about the Sensoriums to guess they might be able to do something like this, show her what should have happened. Stacy had confirmed it for her. But, really, coming out and watching it... It was a mistake.

But she had to do it. She couldn't bear the thought of hurting her friends. Of hurting Shift. But she had, and now she knew the size of it. Indigo hiccups a bit, watching the horror unfold in front of her, and tries to blink away the tears forming in her eyes as she watches Brainiac, Brainiac 8, Luthor, and Superboy tear into the collected Teen Titans and Outsiders. She ignores Superboy's private drama with Wonder Girl, it's not what she wants to know about. It's not her place to know about it.

She flinches with each energy blast thrown, with every punch that connects. The pair of Brainiacs are a fearsome team, she doesn't believe the Outsiders have a very good chance of winning. Indigo doesn't believe her body is that powerful, the true owner must have kept many abilities to herself. Still, she can't help but smile a little as she watches the others gain what seems to be the upper hand, for all of five seconds before Brainiac 8 unleashes some kind of sonic attack. Her face crumples as she watches that, and as the illusory Shift attacks the Brainiac, she covers her mouth with her hands.

"No. Nonono. Not him." She listens to 'herself' take over, begging Shift to kill her. It's like being punched in the gut, Indigo knows that this would hurt him. She makes a tiny, strangled noise as he turns 'her' into flesh, watching his own reaction to it. The way his face crumples as he holds 'her' to him.

"...Turn it off." Her voice is choked, tears welling up in her eyes. She can't help but think about how much that must have hurt Shift. Killing her. As the recording of another reality fades around her, she sinks to her knees. "I can't... Turn it off." Indigo runs a hand through her hair, grasping a handfull of it, and swallows. Hard. She's not used to feeling like this. She wasn't supposed to be feeling like this. How did people handle it?

In this one moment, she's probably more off-guard than she ever will be again.

Comments

[cabbage-butt.livejournal.com]

Brainiac 5 had overheard what Stacy said on Obs Deck, and after Indigo ran out, he had left as well, taking a moment to quietly question the ship's AI. It made sense that Coluans had eventually reverted to inorganic forms, especially given their fervent desire to remain the superior intellects of the universe. Their treatment of robotic life hadn't been out of true hatred, but fear--fear of being replaced. Becoming that which they feared seemed the next logical step, and would leave their intellectual superiority unchallenged. It had been what had happened generations early in B5's universe. And of course, the idea that they had conquered most of the rest of the universe had also not been surprising. Brainiac 5 is not overly fond of his own species, and doesn't regard them to be particularly noble as a species in the slightest.

At first, he had concerns about Indigo's nature, about the possibility of the Brainiac 8 personality still lying underneath the one that was currently dominant, but after silently watching the simulation she's so engrossed in, he lets that concern drop to the background for now.

"I feel the need to apologize to you," says a calm voice behind her, and if she turns, she'll see a green-skinned...well. Brainiac. He's got the forehead circles and all, even if his facial implants are of a different design and far less sinister looking.

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

Indigo had been too wrapped up in the scene in front of her to notice anyone following her around. She had been so wrapped up in things, even after the simulation ended, she hadn't noticed company standing anywhere near her.

Until he speaks.

Startled, she jerks around, taking to the air defensively. Upon seeing that it's just Brainiac 5, she settles back down to earth, wiping at her face to rid it of the tears streaking it. It's not easy to clear the mix of emotions off of her face, and she still hasn't quite managed it when she responds.

"Why would you need to apologize?" She glances around, giving the area a quick scan for anyone else lying in wait. "You weren't connected to any of this." Now she focuses on Brainiac, giving him a careful scan. Implants. Alien physiology. If she'd actually been around Brainiac, the first one, she'd connect the dots much quicker, but she doesn't have Coluan DNA on any of her files. All of that belonged to the now-defunct Brainiac 8.

[cabbage-butt.livejournal.com]

"I overheard what Stacy said. She told you that one of your ancestors was on board the ship--that you are a Brainiac."

Nodding at the now-empty room, he goes on, "It seems that the Brainiac line is doomed to callousness and cruelty."

He steps into the room, hands clasped behind his back.

"I'm apologizing because if the Brainiac line will indeed continue on as it always has, it means in the future, I will err in some way. Perhaps in how I raise your grandfather--but more likely in continuing our family line at all."

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

"I am Indigo," She corrects. It's not harsh, but it's definitely weary.

And now, more than ever, she is Indigo. Not a Brainiac.

So. This is a Coluan from the past. An organic. She takes careful note of this, filing it away in her vast stores of data. It could be valuable later. "Everyone makes mistakes. You would be Brainiac 5, then." Fleshier than she'd imagined. Younger.

She clasps her hands behind her back and looks him in the eyes, even as her sensors keep scanning. "Your apology isn't necessary."

[cabbage-butt.livejournal.com]

"...Indigo then."

It gives him a moment's pause, but he doesn't seem offended by her renunciation of the Brainiac name. In fact, judging from the way the corners of his mouth quirk ever so slightly, he almost seems pleased.

"Affirmative. I am Brainiac 5. Querl Dox." A pause. "I suppose I should welcome you to the family, even if it's not really a family anyone would desire to find out they were a part of."

There is something inscrutable about his gaze, as if he's trying to size her up, but trying not to reveal anything of himself as he does it. Part of the reason his hands are clasped behind his back (like hers now, he notes) is because they're nearly twitching from the urge to get out his omnicom and scan her, but such things can come later. Right now, there are more important things to learn, things that can't be determined with even the most powerful scanning technologies.

"In that simulation--obviously it only showed you what could have happened, but the choice you made, to die rather than harm others... very few members of the Dox family would make such a choice. As it stands, before today, I was the only member of our line that I knew of that's worked in a remotely heroic capacity. Barring a dimensional counterpart I met on this ship."

Brainiac 2, you don't count. You're a heroic dick, but you're still a Machiavellian dick and collateral damage sucks.

"It's a good sign that you have such a capacity to care for others." Her voice softens just slightly. There's something very stiff about his manner, from discomfort, but he has no idea how to handle himself at the moment. "I know you must be worrying about your nature right now, about what it means now that you've learned all this, but I want to assure you that it means nothing unless you let it."

[top-teen-38.livejournal.com]

Slobo had walked into the sensoriums to see if another karaoke night was happening again. Instead, he came upon a crying blue girl, and visions of destruction. He stayed silent, watching and listening, until she requested the end of the vision.

"Nice work, but my 'pop' woulda killed them all subtly. With a virus or something bastichish like it." Slobo sat down next to her. "Yanno, that chick that looked like you ain't you, right?"

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

"How comforting." She replies drily. Slobo was loud, in breathing and speaking, she realized he'd been there a few seconds after the simulation ended. Indigo reaches up to wipe her face and eyes clean, then looks ahead, fighting to keep her emotions in check. "She wasn't me. She just created me in order to worm her way into the hearts of my team."

[top-teen-38.livejournal.com]

"I feel ya there." Slobo looked at her and smiled warmly. "I'm Slobo. I was made ta replace the universe's worst genocidal, homicidal, deicida... The universe's most 'cidal' bastich. If ya gotta story, Blue, I wouldn't mind listenin'. Maybe I can get ya." He thought of Secret, and figured she would want him to help if he thought he could. No one should sit alone while mulling over their nature or past.

"Jus' sayin'... New Outsider ta Old Outsider, I got no prob bein' yer soundin' board."

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

"Omnicidal," she states absently. Indigo shakes her head a bit at the idea of just... Talking about it. Telling the story. "I wouldn't know where to begin. I'm not used to talking about myself." Or things like this. It's just beyond her scope of experience, she's got no idea how to process everything right no.

She blinks when he identifies himself as an Outsider and glances over. The new team that Nanoha had mentioned to her? "You're one of the new Outsiders on board this ship?"

[wheresmysuit.livejournal.com]

Nate had come to the door halfway through the playback. For a moment he just stared. He could see the blue girl in the center of the floor, and her twin playing over the simulation. It was evident was was going on. He felt a short pang of recognition. It had only been maybe a week since he'd been in that exact same situation after all. Standing in the doorway, his gaze softened slightly as he watched her sink to the floor. A week ago, he would have turned and walked out. Let the girl deal with her own problems. But not now. He was Iron Lad. A hero. And he didn't walk away, despite the mistakes he'd made.

Walking over to her, he made sure she could hear him coming, and stayed in her line of sight the whole time. He didn't want to startle her after all. When he was within a few feet of her, he sank to his knees in front of her as well, hands in his lap as he stared down at them.

"It's not easy, huh?" His voice was quiet, understanding. Without a trace of any animosity. "Seeing yourself do things like that."

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

She glances up, tracking his movements. As he sits, she straightens her back, wiping at her eyes quickly to rid herself of the tears.

He's had experience. She can tell it in the way he's speaking to her, his body language. After a bit, she nods. "It isn't what I pictured myself doing a few months from now." She glances around where the action had been a few seconds ago, then shakes her head. "I never even thought that something like that could happen. But. It looks like it did."

[wheresmysuit.livejournal.com]

He didn't comment on the wiping of her eyes or straightening. People needed their dignity after all.

Running a hand through his hair, he nodded slowly. He understood all too well. He hadn't betrayed his team. Not yet. But he'd killed. He'd seen what he was going to become. And he didn't like it. "I doubt any of us pictured ourselves being here either. Refugees on this ship." He paused, muling his words over carefully. "I don't know what exactly it was. But...you have a choice. To be better. Right? I mean, this ship... it's like a second chance, for a lot of us."

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

She appreciates that, on a level.

"It's not at all what I predicted would happen during my life, no." In fact, she thought the multiverse, other than their Earth, had been destroyed. The idea that there's more out there is a little stunning, and worth looking into. Indigo nods as he finishes. "You are right, it is a second chance." She's silent for a moment, thinking about the scene she'd been watching earlier. "I'd rather take that second chance myself. I am not Brainiac 8." The last is firm, as if she's saying it more for herself than anyone else.

[static-shock68.livejournal.com]

Static was quiet as he came into the sensoriums. He'd been looking for a nice spot to just.. relax,maybe relive some of the things he was missing. Sure, leading the Outsiders was pretty awesome, and everything with Rose was fantastic, but there were still a number of things he was missing from home, and the sensoriums were about as close to that as he was going to get. He didn't expect them to be in use.

Much less by a dead Outsider.

Who wasn't handling too well.

"If it makes you feel any better, they all pulled out of it just fine."

It was all he could think of to say about it; the pivotal moment that killed the Outsiders.

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

Her head snaps to look at Static, a little surprised that she hadn't sensed him. But, well. She'd been to absorbed in the hologram to be paying attention to her surroundings. Anywhere else, it probably would have been a fatal mistake, now it was just embarrassing.

She wipes the tears away and composes herself, standing. "I'm glad." She knows that they weren't all 'just fine'. A look at Shift's face right before she turned off the sensorium told her that. But if they were well physically, they'd eventually recover mentally. No one got to be a superhero without some form of mental trauma in their life.

"I needed to see for myself." She couldn't say why, really. But she did.

[static-shock68.livejournal.com]

"It was a bad time for both the teams. But, they pulled through. Kind of. I can tell you what happens next, if you want."

Static knew it was a idea that would just cause her more pain, but, sometimes the pain of truth was what you really needed.

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

She considers it for a moment. If this were a case of outright time travel, she would probably refuse. But the entire thing is so convoluted, and there wasn't a universe to return to, so there was no point in not knowing.

Besides, she'd always been the curious type.

Indigo nods. "Please tell me."

[thethirdhalfa.livejournal.com]

Dani had come into the Sensorium to see someone crying. She had no idea what or why, but she didn't think it was good to just leave her there. So, even though she didn't know her, she walked over.

"Hey, are you okay?"

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

It takes Indigo a moment to reply, she's wrestling with her emotions and shoving them into a tight little space so that her voice doesn't waver or crack when she responds. When she says "I'm fine," it comes out as a little too blank, too hollow. "I just need a moment."

[thethirdhalfa.livejournal.com]

Dani frowned at that, looking more worried. "No, you're not," she said and reached out to touch her shoulder. "I don't know what happened...but if there anything I can do to help?"

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

"I'm fine," she repeats, wiping at her eyes. "It's just... Something that didn't happen. That's all." Something that didn't happen being her attacking her team, overridden by the genocidal owner of her body, but Indigo's been known to understate things in the past.

[reallyiscrazy.livejournal.com]

Jason had been watching from the beginning. Watching as Donna died, as the Outsiders mounted their attack, as the girl died in her lovers arms. His heart broke for her. He knew the pain of seeing yourself do something you don't want to do. He knew the feeling of betraying all that you love. Of watching your family, die. He looked around the empty room and frowned.

"Stacy, Gotham Park please." The room morphed around them to show the peaceful park. The trees swaying in a wind that he couldn't really feel. He moved towards the girl on the floor and dropped to his knees.

"I want to tell you that it gets easier. But the pain never goes away. Even if you haven't done this yet, heck you might never do it. The pain of that knowledge. That would could do this." He shook his head a bit. "Sorry, I had this planned out in my head when I first saw you, but it ain't coming out right."

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

She jerks a little at the unexpected change of surroundings, then takes a minute to examine the area, then examine the man who called for the change. No one she's familiar with, it seems. It's going to take some getting used to, not knowing everyone she lives with.

She wipes her eyes and stands, taking a step or two away. Just enough to put an arm's distance between them. "You know about me already?" That means that he knows one of the Outsiders, probably Nightwing since he's the only one on the ship. Of course, Nightwing has an utterly ridiculous amount of contacts in the hero community, it's impossible to actually pin down Jason's identity with that knowledge alone.

Or, maybe, he saw the little drama with Superboy.

Either way, she shrugs loosely and stares out at the park, crossing her arms. "Stacy says she's wiped out Brainiac 8. That this can't happen. But the fact that it did happen somewhere..." She shakes her head. "That's worse than knowing that it could."

[reallyiscrazy.livejournal.com]

"I've seen you with the Outsiders once or twice." He shook his head as she put distance between them. He was trying to be friendly here, and the chick didn't seem to want that. Whatever. "I'm Nightwing's brother. Jason Todd. Or Red Robin." He wasn't going to call himself the Red Hood for now. After all, he was trying to turn his life around.

Jason wanted this girl to trust him. He didn't know why he was trying so damn hard for friends, but he wanted them. So he looked around at the park and then sighed. "Stacy, can you play out my last arrest please?" The scene shifted and started to run through. The Red Hood and Scarlet taking down Batman and Robin, tying them up and leaving them there. Then the Flamingo showed up. Jason looked away and closed his eyes.

The scene continued to play out. Batman, who was very obviously Dick, showed up with Robin and Flamingo falling to his supposed death. Then there was Gordon. And Jason telling Dick he could bring Bruce back. And Jason couldn't watch anymore.

"Gotham Park please." His voice was soft but Stacy heard him. He looked back up at Indigo and frowned. "That scene? It hasn't happened for me yet, but it happened in some future I have. I'm just a common criminal to them, but that's not what I want. I never wanted that." He shook his head.

"I guess we all have a part of ourselves we don't want."

[indigoblueberry.livejournal.com]

Or there's that possibility. She's more shaken than she'd like to admit if she's forgetting that. "I wasn't aware Nightwing had a brother." She sizes Jason up, frowning. Then again, Nightwing was the member of the Outsiders that she knew the least about.

Indigo watches the scene impassively, then looks down at Jason, brow wrinkling slightly. "I'm sorry." And, despite the slight awkwardness of her expression, there's a real feeling of sympathy in her voice. She, perhaps unexpectedly, stretches a hand out, for him to take if he wants. "I think I may have gotten a better deal than you, however. This never happened to me. And, thanks to Stacy, I will never need to worry about it."

And then she gives Jason a soft little smile.