Newbie Meet N' Greet

[cityship]

Meet n' Greet, smell my feet, gimme something good to eat! Unfortunately, the newbie meet and greet takes place the same time the command staff is congregating, so they might be a little late to the party.

But the crew is there to welcome the newcomers and explain their situation. At the end of the milling and spilling about, the command staff is going to start a general meeting to apprise everyone of their situation and discuss their next course of action:

Getting off the damn ship.

Comments

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"I've got more questions than the psychic hotline's best customer," Buffy quips, offering Wyn a small smile. "I kinda wanna start with where am I, but I'm gonna introduce myself and tell you that my name's Buffy - no, seriously, it is Buffy - and just...go from there. Hi."

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"I'm Gwydion, and the issues I have with that particular name could be listed until the eventual heat death of the universe and I still wouldn't be finished, so just call me Wyn. Everyone does." Wyn says, grimacing slightly.

"Anyway. I have slightly fewer answers than you've got questions, mostly 'cause I'm not psychic, but you're onboard Stacy, who is a very unhelpful giant organic psychic transdimensional spaceship." Well, that's the basics out of the way, at least.

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"Gwydion," Buffy says off-handedly, "pretty name. But Wyn works just as well." Buffy understands, she does. She's gotten a lot of flack about her name from everyone from, well, Lothos and the Master to that weird woman from the pyramid that came out of nowhere who, for some reason, couldn't quite comprehend the fact that a champion of justice could be named...Buffy.

At least its better than Zsa Zsa?

"Organic...psychic...transdimensional spaceship?" She looked around. "Uh. She wouldn't by any chance be created by someone named Andrew or Tucker Wells, would she? Can I...call her a she?"

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"Oh, it's a nice enough name. For a boy." And that right there would be the root of all Wyn's problems with her name.

"I think you can call Stacy a she. Aren't ships usually 'she' regardless of whether or not they talk in your head? And as far as we know, she's kind of... not created by anyone named Andrew. Or Tucker. I mean, unless they can move entire cities into a spaceship by themselves, which is theoretically possible but not probable." Wyn says thoughtfully, her train of thought slightly derailed.

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"No. They were crazy, but they weren't...that talented. Not that...science fiction was really their forte. Except for where they were like walking Star Wars encyclopedias..." she yammers on for a moment before trailing off. "So, do we know why we're here? Or is it gonna be some surprise nastier than the clothes they've forced onto us?"

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"A little of both, and it's probably going to be more like a surprise nastier than the bathrooms." Wyn says. The bathrooms have sort of achieved a legendary status as 'someplace you do not want to go ever' (at least to Wyn). "Stacy mentioned a Great Purpose to you, right? Anyway, so, as far as we can tell, we've been drafted from across multiple parallel universes to fight these omnicidal aliens called the Ohm... yeah, 'ohm' like the unit of measure."

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"I'm sorry - the bathrooms? What's so unfortunate about the bathrooms?" Oh, oh god, it's not like those pictures of bathrooms that Buffy's seen online, are they, where it's a hole in the ground in some unfortunate third world country? Coz...ew. "And...so, do the Ohms like...measure...things?"

Aliens? She was chosen to fight aliens?

Maybe they're alien demons?

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"Um. The whole ship is alive. Now take that idea, and apply it to the bathrooms." It's not a hole in the ground. It's worse. "... and not that I know of? It's just kind of an unfortunate choice of name for omnicidal aliens."

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"The bathrooms are...alive?" Uh. Are they gropey as well? Coz...ew. A thousand gallons of ew. "So, living bathrooms, outer space, evil aliens, no mall. This sounds like the best vacation spot this side of nowhere."

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"Well, there's one in the City that's normal. Thank God." Wyn says with a small shudder. "It's kind of fun being in space, though, if you can get over the kidnapping. And there's a way around the whole 'no mall' thing."

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"There's a city but no mall?" Buffy asked skeptically. What, was the city taken from like Antarctica? "I'll...get used to it. I mean, I lived above the mouth to hell. How bad could this be, right? So...what's...the way around the whole no mall thing?"

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"Imaginariums! ... or the Sensoriums, if you want to use the technically-accurate-but-less-interesting name. It can pull images and memories out of your mind and make you think they're real. Ergo, mall." Wyn is just a wealth of information about things on the meatship, isn't she?

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"So, it's like being high and imagining things without the actual getting of the high?" That certainly sounded like it had it's merits. "Does it...create people too?"

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

"... never thought of it like that, but yeah, actually, it's a bit like being on drugs." Wyn says thoughtfully. "It can make people, but I've never done it. I think it's kind of creepy, to be honest, but I know other people've done it."

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"..." Angel. I mean, not that I would because...bad Buffy! Bad! But...Angel. And Jell-O. And...no! Bad Buffy! "Yeah, it would be...creepy." So...why doesn't Buffy sound creeped out then?

[madeofwyn.livejournal.com]

Buffy sounds distracted. "Anyway. Um... oh, wait, one more thing. Stacy's kidnapped people from different universes, and the whole everything-fictional-is-real-somewhere thing definitely applies. So, as a hypothetical example, pre-lava-and-child-slaying Anakin Skywalker is onboard. Half the ship knows he turns into Darth Vader, but do you see us mentioning that to him? No. Because that would be suicidal. Just be nice about the whole metafictional thing, is what I'm trying to say."

Look at Wyn, not mentioning that Buffy is one of those fictional people to her.

[i-died-twice.livejournal.com]

"Wait, we have a little Anakin?" Buffy asked, raising an eyebrow. She was, currently, thankful that sixteen year old Buffy hadn't been chosen for this. Because sixteen year old Buffy would perhaps not have taken this as calmly as twenty-two year old Buffy was. "I mean, that's just...huh."