Office Hours [Open, everyone feel free to bother GLaDOS]

[fabricaketions]

One of the Sensoriums is active. Inside it's been made to look like a spacious office. A whole wall of windows opens up on a bright but indistinct cityscape. The decor is sleek and modern, though the predominant black and white with no color is perhaps a bit too stark. Some absolutely untouched-looking books sit on a shelf and a plant that is far too green to be real sits in the window collecting dust. There are barely audible stirrings of bad office muzak that are not entirely blocked out by the walls. It's all very sterile and feels off, like it's been put together by someone with a precise list of things that an office is but no understanding of what it's like to be in one.

Suspended over the desk is a gigantic robot.

It glares balefully at anyone who looks in. Or at least it seems to, thanks to that yellow "eye" in its "face".

"Oh. Hello. Come in. Make yourself at home," GLaDOS says. Under her attempt at a flat tone is the faintest hint of resentment.

She does not want to be here. At all.

Comments

[fabricaketions]

"Were all technological advances fueled by magic?" she asked. Perhaps it had made these people lazy and they'd come to rely on it instead of science. How sad.

[fabricaketions]

"Yes, of course they will," GLaDOS replied. Oh, those dastardly crew members and their lack of respect for her scientific endeavors!

She'd be ready for them.

"In that case, I have a lot of work to do," she said, suddenly full of clear purpose. They wouldn't skew her data without a fight!

[fabricaketions]

"I suspect it's complete incompetence on the part of the person that repurposed her." GLaDOS could only shrug. Well, she couldn't actually shrug, but somehow the robotic body language was similar.

"I suppose it could be worse. We could be on an actual prison ship."

[tetsuwan_atom]

Atom smiled, apparently completely unaware of what he'd done.

"Okay. I'll leave you alone, then. Nice meeting you, GLaDOS!" And then he was off in search of other adventure.

[burnedbrighter]

Azula continued agreeing though she herself refused to imagine a future where she was not the central figure. In this moment of calm she found she could even control her blood pressure and heart rate again.

"That's because we fear change, and even more we fear things we cannot hope to understand. At least...lesser humans do." She chuckled "But since the moment I realized that I was saved by this ship, and that you are playing some part in keeping me alive I knew to appreciate it." A lie. Frankly she thought that she deserved to be kept alive on merit of her past glory and what she could do for the mission. But she continued on.

"In my world we don't have technology as advanced as you. If we did no doubt beings like you and Stacy would be in charge there as well."

[first_in_time]

"I can't see how it's all that different," she pulls out the chair from in front of the desk and sits, legs crossed over the knee. "So many places we're not allowed to enter, the food is...questionable, and the clothing can be somewhat limited. Were it not for the city, I'd have no reason to not believe that this was an actual prison ship."

Barbara sighs, leaning back in the chair, realising just how not intimidated she now feels in comparison to when she first walked in. "What do you do on the ship?" she asks, "you're not like anyone else here." So her only conclusion is that this GLaDOS is a part of the ship herself.

[laughsassinate]

"So you mean for me to practice at it?" The thought was daunting and already he garnered a preconceived sense of that familiar wooziness. "If that's what you think I should so, then... fuck, maybe I should!"

Where was my notif damn youuuu

[thewunderkind]

"Yeah...I guess," she replied, unfazed by the idea she was being watched everywhere. Lash had been watched everywhere for most of her life. Everywhere.

She turned around the robot, thinking. "I'd think they still give you something more...I dunno. Maybe they were too afraid to hit the uncanny valley or something with you and the space cores. You've both got the ability to learn beyond pretty much any other type of dumb robots...although in Wheatley's case I'm not even sure about that... and yet they just put you guys up like that. It sounds disrespectful, in a way. Heck even when we made Jugger in Black Hole...here let me show you..."

An representation of Jugger appeared for a minute, before disappearing again.

"But in the end it's all what you like best, I guess."

[moms_temperment]

"So it's kinda like training." Hana mused aloud. "Only for your brain and your body."

He grinned. "Sounds kinda cool."

Putting his hands behind his head, Hana shrugged. "Well, even training is unpopular to alot of people so that makes sense."

He was quiet for a moment, thinking, then spoke up. "But, like, is there anyway to volunteer?" These 'tests' might be the thing he's been looking for lately.

[wizardsaregodtier]

"Hmm, that's a complicated question, and requires a complicated answer," he said, folding his arms thoughtfully. "Some background: My homeland is at approximately what the histories of Earth I've studied refer to as the late-medieval period, prior to the invention of gunpowder but after the evolution of full plate armor. However, it has remained at that approximate level for hundred of years, and I believe that is due to both the presence of magic as an equalizer force rather than technology, and the fact that amongst the rulers of the land, 'divine right' is literal fact rather than a justification for rule."

[fabricaketions]

GLaDOS was still suspicious. Bent though her view of reality was, she still knew that there were not a lot of reasons for Chell to want to deal with her civilly. It was probably a trick, but it was also unusually... cooperative. Chell had never actually communicated with her in words before.

"Well then," she said. "Maybe we can work something out. But the first time you try to burn part of me, this truce is over."

[fabricaketions]

"I am fettered in similar ways, though being a sophisticated artificial intelligence is quite different from being a human," GLaDOS replied. She was being pretty conversational by this point, not as obviously irked as at the start.

"I monitor the crew for dangerous avia fluctuations, test them when necessary, and occasionally return unsatisfactory crewmen to stasis."

[fabricaketions]

"Test subjects, when given repeated similar tests, quickly grow accustomed to the challenge and attain better scores," GLaDOS assured. "I can hardly imagine that this is much different."

GLaDOS, of course, had never been subject to dizziness.

[fabricaketions]

GLaDOS had no wealth of experience with someone thinking about her and trying to do helpful things for her. It was bizarre. It was nice, yes, but also really strange!

She also always loved a compliment.

"Regardless of the intent behind my design," she said, "it has more or less worked to my advantage on most occasions." There was, however, the murder incident.

She paused.

"...However...."

There was an idea.

"Crewman. If I were to give you a schematic, could you build something for me?"

[fabricaketions]

Lesser humans. GLaDOS caught that.

"Worlds where human technological advances have lagged behind are reasonably common. Clashes between civilizations with greater and lesser technology levels generally favor the scientific," GLaDOS confirmed.

"Tell me, Crewman. Do you consider yourself a greater human?"

[first_in_time]

"What are avia fluctuations?" Barbara asked cautiously after a moment. She contemplated asking what made a crewman unsatisfactory, and how GLaDos was testing people. There was something ominous about the idea of GLaDOS testing the crew.

[fabricaketions]

"It doesn't sound like a very pleasant place to live," GLaDOS noted. She was being entirely sincere.

[fabricaketions]

"I have had a volunteer for testing in the past," GLaDOS admitted. Lash had surprised her with the request, but it had been easy enough to do.

"If you would like to test beyond what is usually deemed necessary, it's a simple matter to arrange. You'd have to use this sensorium, though, as I cannot leave it at the moment."

[fabricaketions]

"Fluctuations in the state of a person's avia, which are common in the bleed," she explained. "An unsatisfactory result means that an avia has become too detached from a person and it is to their benefit to be returned to stasis in order to recover."

[thewunderkind]

There could be so many consequences to this. Really a lot of them. But this was Lash we were talking about. Common sense wasn't her strong forte in times like this. GLaDOS had said the magic words - BUILD and SCHEMATIC.

"Uh let me think about---YES."

[fabricaketions]

"Good, good."

GLaDOS had a plan. It was a great plan.

"This is reference file X00A279905, as it currently exists in the ship's library."

GLaDOS projected a very detailed diagram of an oblong robot that was roughly a meter high, with three "feet" sticking out of the bottom of the long oval. A single "eye" that was also, apparently, a gun rested halfway up the body.

A turret.

"Can you build this?"

[first_in_time]

That was a relief to hear, though something still didn't sit comfortably. What it was, Barbara wasn't certain. She sat forward a little in the chair, "does that happen often?"

[burnedbrighter]

Azula was silent for a moment, many moments. One may begin to wonder if she'd heard the question at all until her voice drifted out slowly, as if she had to piece each word together one at a time.

"I did...once. Once I was great. Perfect. Perfect perfection in it's most perfect form. Who could ask for more?"

Her father, her father could ask for more.

"But I wasn't perfect. Flawed, Cracked. Cracking. Splitting apart thread. By. Thread." She plucked a spare thread from the sleeve of her robe and examined it like all the answers to the universe could be found in there.

"There were scared of me. Scared of what I was. What I could be. So they betrayed me. But that I could have overcome. After all they weren't perfect." She half mumbled half babbled as her grip began to slip once again. But she was so caught up in her self reflection she didn't even realize it. In her eyes she was just telling a story. It almost felt like it wasn't even her story really. Just the story of a girl. A twisted little girl named Azula.

"But then even HE was scared of me The one who made me perfect. Tried to leave me behind. Keep me at arms length so he could protect himself you see? You understand? I was too much! I was what he wanted and it was more then he could stand so he was going to LEAVE!" The last part was shouted and there was a blinking in her wild eyes where she seemed startled by her own voice echoing in the chamber.

Slowly...so slowly she sank into the chair. The clouds were parting again allowing a ray of light in to shine upon the jumbled mess of awareness. She'd been ranting again. Sometimes she did that, sometimes even when she was alone.

shoulders slumped she sighed a heavy world weary sigh. "And so I was made...as I am..." She finished trailing off as she tried to clear the fog that had begun to settle on her mind once more.

[fattynoparents]

She knew this was a crapshoot, and that agreeing to test could just as easily mean a truce as it could testing forever and ever. Like always. Chell needed to make their terms incredibly clear before setting foot inside a chamber.

No testing indefinitely. You will have to let me go between testing tracks. And I want a Portal Device.

[moms_temperment]

"So, I can just ask? I don't need to sign up or go through any kind of 'procedure' junk"

He shuffled. "I mean, I don't wanna go right now, I wanna let everyone know first but I'd still like it to be pretty soon, if that's cool."