"Okay, yeah. Let's stack up the awful things we've each lived through and really get an argument going, because there's no way that's going to turn ugly. Newsflash, Stumpy, your tragic life story doesn't impress me much," he says, filling up his coffee cup yet again.

"You can keep your temporary, fleeting normal. Get everyone nice and soft for when things really go bad, and then watch as they're totally unprepared and eat each other alive - literally, maybe - and get some warm fuzzies out of it. Whatever. I don't even know why I asked."

He winces as the boiling coffee takes the top layer off his tongue. "Also, just so you know? You suck at Tetris."