Something the new hatchlings ought to notice eventually is the black and viscous... thing hanging from the ceiling, somehow eating from a tray of slop despite being upside down. The fact that he can't keep his mouth shut is probably a large factor in both these scenarios.

"Hello and welcome to Stacy and Spidey Inc., paranormalists at large! Spooks spooked, goblins gobbled, UFOs K.O.ed, aliens alienated, vampires evaporated, and monsters remonstrated. No job is too small, no fee is too big!"

He drops from the ceiling, landing butter side down, "I can imagine you're a bit Teenage Lobotomy right now, but never fear. Your Friendly Neighbourhood Spider-Man and his gang of loveable miscreants are here to help!"